9 pm

{part one of poems i will never finish}
-it's 9:16 and i feel like vomitting up all the love i have for him. but i know i need to keep it under lock and key for the nights my bones wont stop shaking. on the nights i forget what a beautiful love we had.
my mother told me i should focus more on what i want in my future. but what future is there without those whom you love? its no use living for yourself. every one wants you to stay alive for them.
it's 9:21 now and i want to wrap myself in all my past mistakes until they feel like home.
the beauty in my skin has begun screaming to see the moon. but im not yet ready to admit how much i crave sharp medal digging to find her.
there are wildflowers growing in my head. i did not plant them and they will not leave.
i hope they never do.
for though they take up too much room they bring the rain to survive.
its 9:42 now and i want to draw my poems on my skin so that i can feel something again.-
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