you place together these broken pieces of me

to find comfort in your arms is disconcerting (to me)
for I have been hurt, and within that pain
i lost pieces of my faith, my innocence
(some of my sweetness, too)

i settle into the curve of your palm
happy to stay here [for a while]
in this gentle cradle

your kindness touches me
as tangibly as your lips at my cheek.

the way you look at me
[so respectful and sweet]
makes me feel like a lady

when your eyes meet mine
[with desire]
i want to melt into the swirls of your fingertips
and taste the salty secrets of your skin

each time we part
-i think it will be the last-
yet
every time i find that i return

yes, every time i learn
a little more about the way
your heart beats

every time i add my fragrance
to your rumpled cotton sheets.

my heart
has cried a lifetime, it seems -
for (initially) a boy
shattered glass within my chest
and yet somehow you [slowly]
bring the pieces back together
(reflecting hope every which way)...

suddenly there is a new way to see

suddenly there is a heart
beating clearly
inside of me.

Reviews

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

another divine piece of literature my dear... showing how when we are hurt it can be hard to get close to another until someone breaks through those protective walls to see inside our glass heart and giving it the curtain it needs to feel protected again... what can I say your way with words is unmistakeable and incredible.

every time i add my fragrance
to your rumpled cotton sheets.

these lines here by the way... WOW... now these is very sweet but sexy

[Randall Richard]

your word are pure and clean, you need no flash or glitter, just honesty. i am humbled

[Lola Nation]

MARVELOUS - SO MUCH MORE VIVID IN MY MIND, I CAN STILL FOLLOW THE PAUSES IN YOUR SPEECH - GREAT.

(one change - my my up at the top) [typo] my my faith, my innocence

[Kara Emily Krantz]

wow lola lola you so completely helped me!!

i have been sitting here for hours trying to fix that freakin' thing! lol and i just couldn't do it (headache killing me, etc) and i was just like screw it just post it...

and then my little lola angel shows up and completely helps me rock it!! thank you so much darlin'....

i took a lot of your suggestions (not all of them) but you ABSOLUTELY got my head and heart in the right place to honestly place those words upon the page... thank you thank you thank you :)

hugs. big hugs :)

[Lola Nation]

beautiful poem and eloquently written - I have a couple suggestions for tightening.

finding comfort in your arms is disconcerting
for I have been hurt and within that pain
i lost pieces of my my faith, innocence
(some of my sweetness)

i settle into the curve of your palm
happy to stay here [for a while]
in this gentle cradle

your kindness touches me
tangibly - your lips at my cheek.

the way you look at me
[so respectful and sweet]
makes me feel like a lady

when you look at me
[with desire]
i want to melt into the swirls of your fingertips
tasting the salty secrets of your skin

each timewe part
-i think it will be the last-
yet
every time i find I return

yes, every time i learn [itals]
a little more about the way
your heart beats
i add my fragrance
to rumpled cotton sheets.

my heart
has cried a lifetime-
initially a boy shattered glass within my chest
and yet somehow you [slowly]
bring the pieces back together
(reflecting hope which way)...

suddenly there is a new view

suddenly there is a whole heart
beating
inside of me.