The Little Ghost Girl

The little ghost girl,

She is my only friend.

I know somehow this isn't right, the reason being that she is dead.

She keeps me company though.

I never like it when she has to take her leave and go. 

We stay up all night just talking to each other.

Back and forth.

She disappears in a quick poof when there's a knock at the door.

I don't know why I'm the only one that can see her but I kind of like it this way.

No one else can come on by and steal her, shes forever my friend to be with and play.

She always tells me to look in the mirror though to see what I see.

Finally, I humor her and take a look.

Only to find that the dead girl is me.

Author's Note

Im sure I will add more onto this one in time

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

lots of ways to interpret this one and to take it if you come back to it with a rewrite. We all have those parts of us that are deceased - yet we cant let them go.

[The 12th Enigma]

Woah! that last line surprised me! Keep up the great work :)

[L.M.Warde]

I very much love the creepy (as you can tell from my topics.) Very nicely done! I liked how you revealed at the end. Abrupt and unexpected. Thank you for posting!

[Scott Mou]

Well thats creepy, reminds me of an episode of Goosebumps. I like it!

Keep Up The good work

[Natalia]

creative! I really like this one :)

[penny]

I'm really very interested to read more about this girl!

[Stevo The POE-t]

Thanks for sharing it... I enjoyed it... Great read...

[Catherine Frain]

Hi....I am willing to give a more critical analysis of the poem. I am also taking an AP English class in high school that has taught me how to do this..and I need the practice. Sorry if this seems harsh, but I am suggesting minor ways in which if you wish can take into action. :D Sorry.

The little ghost girl --I would put some kind of punctuation mark here, I would suggest a comma as the thought trails into the next line.--
She is my only friend --I would put some kind of punctuation mark here, I would suggest a period as the thought ends.--
I know somehow this isn't right, the reason being that she is dead. --This is perfect. Show's the narrator's thought process perfectly.--
She keeps me company though. --This is good, thought the word "though" can be replaced with a stronger word, which will hold more impact.--
I never like it when she has to take her leave and go. --The start of the line: I never like it... is a confusing wording choice.--
We stay up all night just talking to each other.
Back and forth. --This line and the line above it, can both be merged into a single line.--
She disappears in a quick poof when there's a knock at the door. --Good--
I don't know why I'm the only one that can see her but I kind of like it this way. --Good....but uses "I" a lot.--
No one else can come on by and steal, shes forever my friend to be with and play. --may I suggest: come on by and steal *her*, ....--
She always tells me to look in the mirror though to see what I see. --Good--
Finally, I humor her and take a look. --I would end with a comma and not a period, as the thought continues on the next line.--
Only to find that the dead girl is me.

[Abeer until dawn]

very deep ... it's healthy for the creative mind to stay attached to the darkest side of its being.
Strong imagination, Sarah.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Yer would be good to add more to it, but it could sound like an ending to either way it sounds good.
I like this peace has a good little story to it, and a surprise twist at the end.
Well written :)