and let it kill me instead

you hurt me, but i can't hurt you back

As I see you walk over to me,
I fight away the tears.
I put on my brave face, and swallow the pain.
She is with you, holding your hand.
We greet each other, I fake a smile.
You introduce me to her, but I already know her.
She was that girl you would talk too
on the phone at night while I lay next to you,
pretending to be asleep.
You ask me how I have been.
I want to tell you that I miss you, that The nightmares
are back now that you can't hold me at night.
That I can not deal with you leaving me for her.
Why her, yes she is gorgeous but she can get any guy, unlike me.
She doesn't need you like I do.
I need you to hold me together because I am falling apart.
I want to tell you this is all your fault.
That you did this to us.
To me,
but that would hurt you.
so I lie and say I am doing great,
and let it kill me instead.