Water's Pull

Inspired by a trip to the beach one evening...

The bubbling water prances up,

caressing the pale, golden sand

with its rippling, flow of emotion.

 

The evening sunbeams are icy,

painting the waves as liquid steel;

though lacking in the usual color,

they sparkle with purified fragments of Fire,

like a giant pane of fiery glass

shattered into a million glowing pieces.

 

The harsh, diamond light pierces through

every shadow there ever was,

splitting the veils of deception

and showing the true nature of all things.

And though they are as unyielding as the gods,

the harsh rays are, in their own way, uniquely beautiful.

 

As I walk along the catalyst of land and sea,

the water draws me in with its fluid motion.

Though the light is near-blinding,

I'm intriqued by its powerful lure.

Within minutes, I'm splashing my way through it,

inexurably caught by water's magical pull.

Author's Note

As always, feel free to critique.

Reviews

[Michael X]

This writing is powerful, I thoroughly enjoyed reading the creative effort put forth, the passionate design
itself is ment to transpose images of walking along the shore leading to eternity, vivid description of the

water is well laid out, to think of diamonds create a sharp imprint into the features composing the depth
the metaphorical analogies flow with function, and allow the reader to fully visualize the impression,

work that paints itself upon the readers mind with stunning detail.
Very nice job, Mike

[Wildfleour]

Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Much better (I think)! :)

[Wildfleour]

Your wiccan/buddhist self is showing in this writing (by the way, I totally get that combo!)

shards - I am not a fan of that word.

inexurably - ?

[Ebb and Flow]

As always I loved it! It's beautiful and makes me want to see a sunset at the beach. I miss the lure of the ocean.

[Chelsea]

I love it! The words you choose were very beautiful. I like how you picked them carefully to describe it.
Except this:The evening sunbeams are are icy,
I think you need to take out an are. I believe it's just a mistake though.