I want to be touched

Starting off with a few throw backs from the past.

I want to be touched.
I've denied myself this want in order to cleanse myself.
Only w****s want to be touched.
But it's not only w****s because...
I want to be touched.

I want to feel someone's skin next to mine. I can't ignore it anymore.
My body aches for it.
I close my eyes and pretend that there's another person there...
touching me.
And why is it wrong?
I feel there is no sin against god.
I can't pretend to be someone I'm not and I...
I am a person who desires to just be felt up.
I want to be touched.

I want warm embraces. I want to be able to feel like there's no way out.
I want to be smothered.
And if I complain I want to be reminded that I wanted this.
I want to make passionate love all over the place.
I want it on the floor.
On the couch,
in the bed.
I want to get filthy dirty and then I want it in the bathtub.
I want to be touched.

I don't want to care whose around while I'm being touched.
I want to scream things that should never be said out loud.
I want to whisper things that make that person touching me want to touch me more.
I want it hard, I want it soft.
I want it rough, I want it gentle.
I want to know I'm desired.
I want to be touched!

God, I just keep believing that it's out there.
That someone is waiting to touch me.
Someone is waiting for the right moment to touch me.
And I don't want hesitation.
I want it. I want it now.
I know what's good for me. I am in touch
with my touching needs.
I'm screaming at the top of my lungs
From every mountain top,
forgetting my overwhelming fear of heights,
that I not only want to be touched.
It's not enough to want it,
it's not enough to long for it.
It's not enough to yearn and churn and burn for it.
Oh no.
I don't want to be touched.

I need to be touched.

Author's Note

A few years old