cra3sh

love once given is forgotten

by receiver and giver unlike

as waves once crash the land

yet lack the will, the might 

three

thats how many letters I wrote 

thats how many hospital visits I endured 

thats how many tears i cant bear to conceal, when any one of your paths cross me 

and their are many 

venice was my escape 

the sun, the souls

the drugs 

I could no longer bare my lovers try to cut my tie 

my tie to you 

three 

thousand 

thats how many times they asked me to cut 

that

tie 

but she is not a that 

venice was no longer my euphoria 

and she was my new oasis

a bigger crash than the waves at my feet 

no matter how mighty 

no matter the will they feat. 

a bigger crash than the beginning 

the real one 

she was my 

one 

three 

that is how old she is today 

our daughter is three years old today 

the uncut 

the pain i imagined i held on to for nine months 

she is three today 

and crash

 - your not here

and just as I follow the slender sand print that formerly flooded with ocean 

tears 

i realized you never were.

- a. a 

Author's Note

looking for suggestions and thoughts constructive criticism is encouraged !!!!