Masochist's Dilemma

Satan bewitched me and now I’m his dog,

Panting and crawling at his feet,

Doing anything if only he would pet me,

I’d gladly set myself on fire if it means you will

Look at me.

 

I blame my flaws on the movement of the stars,

Does this spinning have any real meaning?

It’s deafeningly real in my mind,

But my mind is far detached from reality.

 

My heart keeps me alive,

But it’s leading me astray;

Arbitrarily plotting my demise with my mind,

Aren’t you supposed to be on my side?

 

You have deceived me, but self-deception

Hurts more. I know you are

Making me sick, but only you

 Can soothe me.

The bruises on my face please me;

A happy accident, I want this to happen.

I’m on a leash that is pulled by me;

Heading to a dark place,

Covered in filth,

Where I’ll lay my head in your lap,

Close my eyes and let the world drop dead.