Charms

A Story by Taylor131

she adds a charm to her bracelet for every life she takes

"This one please, I want this charm” I say to the jewelry clerk as I point to a charm. He hands me a bronze charm in the shape of a ballerina slipper. I have two full bracelets of charms now- of different shapes, sizes, and colors. I am now starting my third bracelet. Nobody knows, but I collect them for every life I take. Every soul I kill. Every innocent person I pick out. I pay with cash for it, $15.99, because why would I pay it with a card? They could track me down- the police I mean. The charms usually represent what the person's personality was like, for instance the most recent life I took was a ballerina. She was 15, her name was Tania Phillips. I guess I did it for fun, killing. It was sort of a hobby of mine. And after every victim i killed i would watch the news, there would be missing person's reports, interviews with suspects. But they never caught me. Not once. It was a game for me. I would scout out a person, find their personality and killed them in my own special way I chose. Then i would go to a different state and do the same. But just for fun i always kill in the same state at least 5 times- just different cities. Fun.

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© 2017 Taylor131

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Reviews

Lachlan Randall

I love this concept.
However where's the suspense? the story would have been more horrifying if you had just with-held the central 'twist' a while longer.
And for goodness sake, show not tell. Don't tell me she kills, show me. Don't tell me how, show me how. This isn't to discourage you, I genuinely think you have a great idea here, you just need to work on your suspense.