This Time I Hope It Was Real

This Time I Hope It Was Real

A Poem by ((Teenage_Poet_Loser))
"

We all want love... Even if we don't admit it.

"
Your touch
so soft, you move
so gentle,
your eyes shine
of beauty,
your smile,
make me
happy.
Those are only dreams,
for what is
real,
is a nightmare.
You make me cry,
scream, hate, bleed, vomit.
Will this never end?
"God help me,"
My prayer bounce
from wall
to
wall,
more screams, hate, blood.
"Why don't you die,"
'bang, bang, bang,'
blood drips from the wall.
I close my eyes,
in the middle of the night.
Your touch
so soft, you move
so gentle,
your eyes shine
of beauty,
your smile,
make me
happy.
This time, I hope, it was real

© 2011 ((Teenage_Poet_Loser))


Author's Note

((Teenage_Poet_Loser))
I don't think this poem is good.. bleh! I just wanted to get a message out... People are tough, some aren't, but never will we ever really admit we want to be loved... Some children never get love from their parents, and that is so sad because it stays with them for the rest of their lives... I am fortunate to have love in my home... I need to shut up now :)

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Featured Review

Think you meant .. Your touch is soft .. and you move so gentle ..
Also .. My prayer bounce
from wall .. might be , My prayers bounce from wall to wall ..
your smile,
make me
happy. .. Maybe you meant .. Your smile makes me happy ?

I understand your words .. You just want REAL .. and happy ..

Cool ! .. Jasmine .. .. :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This was one of the most emotional to me because you wanted to get a message out.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Nice write, touching as well as a nice author's note, true and reality.

Posted 12 Years Ago


It is. but a lot of rage. Not a bad thing. Get it out.
But she who lives in your dreams will continue to until she has materialized into reality.
Faith.
have it.
If you need take it.

Posted 12 Years Ago


love is a gift to feel and it comes from inspiration not from obligation...unfortunately responsibility and tension weigh on people to focus on tension rather than seeing the power of love or lack of connection.

Posted 12 Years Ago


This is really well written. Your portrayal of love and how some people receive love that is pure while others only feel the pain of not having it....wishing, hoping to have it and for it to be real

Posted 12 Years Ago


few errors; still the message is clear. truely a stunning piece. don't underestimate yourself: this poem is really good. Great, even. Hell I enjoy most of your writing.

Posted 12 Years Ago


really good poem. i understand where you're coming from :) it's a good poem you really shouldn't doubt yourself, you're a great writer. :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


Love is a vile wicked thing sometimes, especially the unconditional kind. I know it sounds bitter but the depths of damage it can inflict upon a person when that person loves but isn't loved in return is devastating beyond measure. Its the continual acts of trying to gain approval, at least with children, to make someone or a parent love them...its heartbreaking what we are willing to endure all for the sake of love and to be loved in return.

With a bit of tweaking here and there this poem can be quite powerful, especially with the message.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Think you meant .. Your touch is soft .. and you move so gentle ..
Also .. My prayer bounce
from wall .. might be , My prayers bounce from wall to wall ..
your smile,
make me
happy. .. Maybe you meant .. Your smile makes me happy ?

I understand your words .. You just want REAL .. and happy ..

Cool ! .. Jasmine .. .. :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Hmmm... interesting. Shakespeare often wrote sonnets on the beauties of love. But really, most love isn't beautiful.

Though we all wish it could be.

Lovely little poem that, while a little rough, holds a great deal more meaning than some I've read.

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on October 9, 2011
Last Updated on October 9, 2011


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