butterfly in a cage

A poem to describe it feels to love someone that you know you shouldn't. Falling in love with your best friend, who only feels love for you in the most platonic sense, is a gut-wrenching feeling. Unre

i feel as if i am being force-fed butterflies
i can feel their delicate wings fluttering against my stomach lining
their little insect legs crawling up my throat and escaping every time that i try to speak
it makes every word that comes out of my mouth feel tainted,
tainted by my love for you
i do not want to have these emotions anymore
i do not want to feel butterflies in my stomach again they make my stomach so uneasy,
especially when i am near you
it's as if they can sense your presence and they go crazy
they make my stomach do backflips for you
and when i try to speak with you,
i can not stop them from flying out of my throat and towards you
but this love that i feel for you,
this love which magically produced these pesky little bugs
it doesn't feel pure like it once did
perhaps that is because of my deep loathing for it
and this unwanted love that i feel for you has transformed those poor butterflies,
those who only wanted to fly towards you and adorn your skin with gentle kisses
now when they leave me they take on the appearance of moths
born to live only in the dark
yet they still flee towards the light,
towards you
it is as if you are the sun
even just your smile radiates light
and your honeyed touches radiate warmth
i suppose it makes sense that these zombie butterflies despise me
after all,
it is me who is keeping them trapped inside of me
where it is dark and cold
even when i do try to dispel them,
my heart always manages to catch them in an out-stretched hand and return them to me
i am sorry, little butterflies
i did not mean to treat you so cruelly
by keeping you from fluttering towards greener pastures
where you could have flown to your hearts desire in fields of lilies and tulips
if i could free you,
i would
but we are both trapped here
in this emotion
so,
i apologize
but for now
you can only roam free at night and fly towards the all-knowing moon for your light
although i must admit,
the lady of the night is not as warm nor as bright as our lovely sungirl is

Author's Note

ignore grammar issues please. Does this poem invoke feeling within you? Is a clear message being portrayed in my work?

Reviews

[LE Berry]

Elizabeth, very much so, your description of love unspoken and not realized is quite clear. What I love the most about your work here is the use of the butterfly to describe feelings. There is a wonderful blending of delicate beauty and creepy unwanted in what you have brought forth. I've never read anything that has used the butterfly in such a way. I enjoyed this read very much.