White painted walls

Between your white painted walls

I stand in a corner and I look

for the little cracks where

there used to be something once

we used to be untainted

I saw you beat

your own eggs and brood

on the shame;

it gave birth to my guilt

better sorry than safe

Was it your footprint or mine

that soiled the white floors?

Shamelessly, I hide mine

inside yours

Sharp red lines circle me

Strike right through me;

I stand corrected,

You were right:

all footprints are mine

to answer for

Behind the dark door of the night

I dream of secret rainbows and

an endless light

I beg for it to take me and I awake

between the white of your walls

You were right:

I selfishly want it all

I peer between the cracks of paint

There used to be something here

Once;

I can't recall

a memory is a thing too fickle and faint

I saw you throw

away your conscience

and create blame;

I carried it as if it were my name

In the dark I dream of a small flame

and awake to the smell of smoke;

and I apologize

I apologize

I apologize