Gravity

it didn't happen right away, the urge to love him. but it wasn't a slow moving thing that i had time to prepare for either.
but it happened. it came and defied the odds and it was the first time my heart had defied gravity.

i am not a simple creature made of moonlit lavender and soft hands.
i am made of sharp edges with a mind busier than the MacDonald- Cartier Freeway
he once cut himself trying to hold me, i still let him. my heart was defying gravity.
buffers were falling away and i wiggled and altered and fit to adjust in the open air

he blew and my walls fell. there had to have been something bigger than him to make that possible.
he reached and took control out of my hands. there had to have been something exhausted in me to relinquish so easily.
either way, it was the closest i had ever been to the O zone. layers melted and nothing else mattered.
it was the scariest and bravest thing i had endeavored.

but perhaps i'm not an easy love or maybe the urge to throw myself at his feet had died or the chill had rushed past
my pores and touched my bones to wake me up. my heart surveilled its surroundings and terror grew.
the fall back to the ground happened slower than the rise but i was cushioned and ready. as light
as a feather i fell back into my body. to reality.

he felt me slip through his fingers and in that hour i think he learned that love means letting go no matter
how much of my presence was due to his own selfishness and that weightlessness only lived inside of us for a time.

i was never good at staying.