There

A Place between here and now and yesterday. The Place between death and life. The place where Ramsey isn't dead anymore. Our love is there even though we are not. R.I.P. always My Love.

I sit at times feeling desolate with out you. Missing you has become as much a part of me as breathing... It becomes sport to me  because in the miss I find you There.  I search for you in others wishing to hear you speak through them... it doesn't happen. You were an original...a masterpiece...my art from heaven that has now returned to your celestial abode.You are sorely missed. I search for you in familiar people that were erased from my life.. I waste  time with some one that doesn't compare to your resplendence. I kill time with a some body hoping it will feel like you. It doesn't work. I wonder if I will ever have the light you shined on me fill me again. My heart burns with out you. I call your number for old times sake... Only to reminded of your abscence when the recording says this phone number is no longer in service. I miss the songs you played for me. Our love is still alive. What can ease the emptiness of not having you? People say time. I say they are crazy.People say rejoice and celebrate that you have moved back home. I say my rejoicing is cut short in the anguish that though you are where you are supposed to be...  that Where is not here with me. Selfish for you is what I am . My friend.. my best friend... I still hear you utter those words gently and completely from your lips. "You are my best friend." A day with out you feels like perpetuity for it is never ending and continual... Each day resembles the last.For every minute you used to occupy seems so empty. I live on memories as one would food. My hunger for you is never quenched... even when you were here in flesh I could never get enough. I could never get enough of the beauty I found in you. One man.... One beautiful gentle soul that nutured me. I remember you as one does the alphabet or numbers... Constantly reciting you and memorizing you to be sure as to remember you perfectly as if someone will test me on you someday soon. I know I would get an A and make you so proud of me. You are the foundation of relationships to me. You are the fundementals of learning to open up to love unselfishly. You are the ground work of a monument of giving. You are my best friend.. even now....  You are silent in some ways... loud in others. Your abscence is the loudest. My tears drown you daily.My heart is afraid with out you, My Love. Pain sickens me with out  you, My Love . I hold onto hope and I still have faith but that doesn't change  my heart's torment. I pray to dance with you in my dreams... To find you in my slumber...To hold you in my sleep... To lay with you in a vision... I live for  dancing with you in the wind, as  the winds picks up the song  you once played for my heart. With out you I am lonely. You were my best friend. You are my best freind and nothing feels the same now. Our future has changed because you aren't in it. My plans were built around you and I ...built around the children we named  and the way we would raise them. Those things now live in a place Where they are buried only to remember the smile in your voice as we walked down memory lane before the memories came. I visit you there often. I hold your hand in the silence of a broken heart... I see your face through my tears. You are still in me. Sometimes that is the hardest part of  all of this... because the  fact is we became one... united in God and love. We became one person living for the love of our union... breaking new ground... watching it grow Where neither of us would have imagined...right There in that place  is where I  hold onto you...There I see you and live with you...  There I lay with you and eat with you.There is where we still talk...But truly there is no There.

Author's Note

This is a letter of sorts to my late Fiance. There are time when I just need to talk to him or feel like I am communicating with him and I do that through letters like this.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

It is a sad and beautiful letter. Sometime it good to communicate with letters to people missed in a life. Your words told a beautiful story and I'm sorry for the sad ending. We will always remember those who have touched our heart. A very good letter. Thank you.
Coyote