The Psychologist's Office

A 2-5min scene for a class.

THE PSYCHOLOGIST'S OFFICE

© 2011

The entire scene takes place in an office.

Dr. Kale: (enters office, drinking coffee, sits at desk) Where's my eight o'clock?

Lisa: (frantically stumbles in, panting and sweating) I'm here!

Dr. Kale: (eyes widen) Oh, my. Are you quite alright, ma'am?

Lisa: Of course. I was running from the clouds. They're always right behind you, aren't they?

Dr. Kale: Right. (clears throat) Well, this is my first day as a therapist, so-

Lisa: Great, a newbie. So, what do you have in mind? Puppets? Board games? Drawing pictures? It doesn't help. (leans back, whistling)

Dr. Kale: I was thinking we could just talk.

Lisa: Alright. Did you see the new movie with the one blonde actress? She's planning something, I swear. I mean, she just-

Dr. Kale: About your paranoia. Talk. About your condition. Do you understand?

Lisa: Oh! Well... (glances sideways, back and forth, and leans in) there's no condition. Don't believe those other doctors. There are creatures everywhere. They're trying to kill you.

Dr. Kale: Oh. Oh my. Where are they?

Lisa: I told you! EVERYWHERE. They're watching your every move, Dr. Newbie. Planning. Always planning...

Dr. Kale: Are they here now? (turns her head side to side)

Lisa: Of course. (she gets up, pulling her chair next to Dr. Kale.) They're going to get you...(she subtly reaches behind Dr. Kale and pokes her back)

Dr. Kale: Oh! (she jumps off the chair, crouching low and hiding) We're under attack!

Lisa: (in a nonchalant manner, she plops next to Dr. Kale) Uh-huh. After you. All. The. Time.

Dr. Kale: This is a nightmare! (she's visibly shaking now, leaning into Lisa.)

Lisa: Now you see what I go through. (she's much calmer than earlier, and twiddles her hands)

Dr. Kale: Are they still there?

Lisa: Yes. There are ghouls and black creatures and a man with an unfashionable hat!

Dr. Kale: What can we do?

Lisa: (very loud and dramatically) We throw books at them!

Dr. Kale: That makes sense!

(they both begin throwing anything they can find, and overturn the chairs to hide behind. Dr. Kale does this with her eyes closed, never seeing anything behind the chairs)

Lisa: (shouts) This is madness! We need weapons!

Dr. Kale: Oh, this is so unprofessional. (clears her throat, embarrassed)

Lisa: Well, if you say so- (throws her hands up, screaming) It's the spider cloud! Coming towards us! Hide!

Dr. Kale: (shrieks, diving under her desk) This is terrifying! Someone help us!

(Dr. Kale starts to scream, and Lisa puts her hand over Dr. Kale's mouth, shushing her. Dr. Kale rocks back and forth, on the verge of tears. Lisa uncovers her mouth, and sighs.)

Lisa: Look, I think I know what's happening. (she reaches up and grabs a pad of paper from the desk, as well as a pencil) You have paranoia and illusions, Dr. Kale. It's a common condition, you'll be fine! (writes nonsense on the paper, handing it to Dr. Kale)

Dr. Kale: I do? (stares at the paper)

Lisa: Yup. On the paper I wrote the name of several good psychologists who can help you through this. You can get better. (slaps Dr. Kale on the back good heartedly)

Dr. Kale: (nods numbly) Alright.

Lisa: You'll be fine. (stands up, pulling Dr. Kale up as well) Goodbye.

Dr. Kale: (exits, very confused.) Thank you, Lisa.

(A beat of silence as Lisa smiles to herself, approving what she has done)

Lisa: (sits on the desk chair, putting her feet up) Now, where's my ten o'clock?

END

Author's Note

My first attempt at a scene! Aren't you disappointed?

Reviews

[Trixolomanea]

Hahahaha, absolutely Brilliant! Great comedy!

[michaela]

Thank you for making me laugh! :)