Solider Girl

She’s always loud and boisterous. Giving off threats to any one who dares to cross her. she wrestles with her friends during lunch. we all watch her and she knows it but doesn’t care. she will sings her heart out if want to. see doesn’t care if people stop and stare or if they judge. some have even gone up to her and asked her to shut up. she just tells them off.

But today’s she different. she came into the middle of class with slightly puffy eyes and tested stained cheeks. she had her head high but you could tell how much she just wanted to hide. she was holding her rib cage like something heavy had fallen on it and it hurt, a lot.

But her face remained emotionless. she dragged her feet forward looking straight ahead making no eye contact. She dragged herself to the teachers daek and asked for the papers she had missed that period.

“Are you ok?” he asked

She took in a deep breath like she wasn’t trusting her voice. that is wasn’t going to come out strong like it always does.

“Yes, sir. perfectly fine.” Was all she said back then shuffled to her seat.

The room was quiet and everyone was staring at her. Everyone knew who she was, they knew she didn’t like crying. let alone crying in front if people. she worked with one hand while the other was still holding her rib. the room started to fill up with noise and you can tell it was about her. she knew it too. as

she worked as a tear stained her paper. but not once did she sniffle, or break down crying or started a screaming fit. Nope se was just letting tears fall one by one slowly down her cheek and on to her paper. Silently rolling over her perfect lips. lips that were bleeding slightly because she had been biting them.

Although she never said a word, every time her eyes closed even for a second she shuttered, or took sharp intakes. like se was watching a nightmare behind her closed eyes. she probably was. I’ve never seen a girl be so strong. to come to school not even down crying but not once ask for help.

She acted like she was scared to close her eyes. but this time she was ready for it. she took a deep breath and gripped the pencil in both hands. she closed her eyes and your could see the horror on her face. just the slight emotion she showed that she was scared. but then you heard a loud deafening snap. she had broken the pencil in half. A tear slipped from her closed eye lids. she opened her eyes and you could see new tears forming. forming in her prefect blue eyes. with and black ring on the outside.

Tears forming in her eyes that would eventually flow over her cheeks. how I wish that I could be the one to wipe then away. to make sure nobody ever hurt her again. to make sure that those tears were never to be shed again.

Without saying a word she signed out and walked out the classroom.

A few minutes late she came back in. you could hear her trying to stifle her cries before she walked in. she walked in with her head held high.when she sat down her sleeve went up and I saw new lines, red spilling from them. blood. new fresh blood spilling out of the new freshly cut wounds. then her sleeve hid it once again.

I looked at her eyes. I knew that look. that look if hopelessness and of pain. the look where you want to be helped but you know no one would ever want to help a freak like yourself. The look of I’m almost giving up but not yet.

She was still strong. but how much stronger could be. how much longer before those slashes become deep cuts. hoe long before those silent tears become screams of pain.

You could see how scared she was. you could see all the pain. she still had a straight face but her eyes tell the whole story.

She’s not supposed to be like this. she’s supposed to be loud, strong, and brave. not quiet, weak and barley holding on.

The girl next to her asked if she was ok. she shook her head no she didn’t look into the girl’s eyes. just kept looking straight ahead.

The bell rang and as she was gathering her stuff, her eyes meat mine for a second. she knew that I could see her pain. I offered a small smile. she gave one back but it was filled with sorrow.

She turned around and rushed it the door almost running. I could see the new tears leaking from her eyes. I ran out to go find her. and tell her I’m here for her. but she was no where in sight. she was gone.

She’s gone. the soldier girl is gone. My soldier girl is gone.

*btw it’s a guy watching a girl. Just saying. sorry if it’s not what you expected.*