Emotional Rain

My tears fall onto this paper as I write the things I cannot say

In hopes to ease the pain that my tears can't seem to wash away

Line by line, tear by tear, as each one comes about

From the same place on the inside, they end in the same place on the out

My blood flows through my veins like circulating pain

My thoughts pour from my mind like emotional rain

I  take a deep breath, close my eyes start to count

Until the number and my tear drops reach the same amount

I've counted to a hundred and I must count more still

If my sorrows don't drown me this rain surely will

Reviews

[quinfinn]

sounds to me like you need a good umbrella to keep your pages dry as you pour that bleeding heart out. this is so many of my writes, i can't count ...and you speak of counting before you run out of tears or vice versa...this is a terrible emotional storm, the rain will end long enough for you to catch your breath...then you can cry some more. beautiful, Keely....beautiful.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Hi Keely, I like your themes and much of the phrases you use but perhaps you need to read and reread your pieces in order to craft them as artists do. I started looking at one of your poems yesterday and ended up completely rewriting it as it made me think. A draft example of this poem crafted might go like this:
My tears fall upon this paper; write the things I cannot say
In hopes to ease the hurt they can't seem to wash away
Line by line, drop by drop, as each one comes about
From the hurt inside of me, they end up spilling out
My blood flows through my veins like circulating pain
My thoughts pour from my mind like an emotional rain
I take a breath, close my eyes and then I start to count
Until the number of my tear drops reach the same amount
I've counted to a hundred and I must count more still
If my sorrows don't drown me this rain storm surely will

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

This is true...when you started to write but something holds you back.

[larryb]

Good title on this write...was a very emotional write

[redflutterby]

It doesn't rain forever even though sometimes it feels as if it will. Our pain eventually fades and the sun appears again to remind us that life goes on. Wonderful symbolism in this poem!!!

[Ian Faraway]

See, I LOVE this poem. I can relate to this very well, I don't cry but the emotional pain on the inside finds its way onto the paper I'm writing on. Most times it's hard for me to translate my pain and thoughts into words that make sense. J'adore!