As Large as Alone

A sort of response/homage to E. E. Cummings.

As brief as forever, as loud as exist
I’m always expecting a further sharp twist
The brightest of blackouts, an excess of lack
Returns me anew till there’s no coming back

The more that I’m present the more I’m not here
And bravely I’ll tell you I’ve nothing but fear
Is that an enigma? Oh, shall I explain
Why pleasures from yesterday cause modern pain

I’ll never recover the things that I hold
I’ll always be ruing decisions of old
My friends went without me, but took me away
If anyone asks me, I say I’m okay

I’ll blur you with logic, elucidate lies
And then I’ll confront you, I’ll seem like your size
Oh can you believe me? I’m honesty prone,
As salty as sweetness, as large as alone.