silent pain

I pick up the stones I keep dropping

I miss the feeling of her fingertips.

They ran over my soul so slow, 

I miss her sound. 

Her heart, the way it matched my words

I don’t feel the edges of my soul anymore.

The broken heart you left me with I’ve mended.

I don’t love you anymore,

but I wonder what it’d be like if I still did.

I wonder what it’d be like if you left me sane

I wonder.

Would I love the way I did,

could I face another 

and breathe the way I used to.

Would it hurt me to understand,

to feel, to think about another heart beat.

Sometimes I wonder how this cracked 

shattered and emotionless body could still function.

Do I care, I don’t know.

I don’t know how someone could be in so much pain

without anything there to hurt them.

You are a silent pain,

you are a disability.

You don’t linger anymore,

you don’t make me sad anymore.

And I think that’s why it hurts.

-Karina Yusupova.

Reviews

[BThomvanWart]

I felt like this once, but I could never word those feelings that seemed so ethereal and distant as well as you have done right here. Your words are so relatable and they reach into a part of my soul I haven't been to in a while. It was an enlightening journey to read this and I have to say that, even though it was probably painful and dark, it's so beautiful and reviving to see these emotions felt by someone else expressed so vividly. Very great work.

[ReedWrite]

Haunting. Odd, love--and loss--is the same regardless of the players.
This is beautiful.