The suicidal thoughts you have

The title says it all.

Today is the day you decided to kill yourself. 

Today is the day where you look down a building and stare at the concrete where you will land or have a gun pulled next to your head. 

Today is the day where you gather all your courage and go off with a bang to your next life. 

You simply are to tired to care about life anymore and just want to end your suffering. Life is to much of a pain to bare and you can't handle it anymore. You have broused online sites that have numerous suicidal survivors or people encouraging to not let go of your life, but you simply don't care. You try to convince yourself that things will get better for you, so you wait weeks, days, months and even years for it.

After waiting for that long you realize that it won't happen. You're a small puppy who has been waiting for it's owner to come and  give you a treat but he never does. No matter how much you pray, no matter how much you cutt, no matter how much you care, you still feel like crap. So what is the solution to this? Death you answered.

You might have a tough family, you might have been raped, or have been bullied in the past. Everybody hates you either way and you're alone without anybody to care for you. However, you're still hoping that a prince in shining armor would save you or your life can be turned into a magical fairy tale, keep dreaming. Nothing will help you and are forever trapped inside the darkness that slowly swallows you every single day.

I have had these feelings and still do yet I'm still alive everyday to wake up and question my existence and I don't know why. I guess I'm just to afraid to do my jump of fate. So what now you wonder. Which the only thing I can say is that it depends on you. I can't say what you should do in your life, I don't have the authority to do so. The only thing I can do is to make you continue to read this.

So what is the point of reading this you ask, which my answer is that you are going to have to make your on point. You can use this to kill yourself or continue to read this. It all is up to you.

Author's Note

Who knows when I'll be posting?