It wasn't just a dream

Its not everyday that your crush finally turns to become your boyfriend... so when it happens its worth writing about.

6 MONTHS!,6 months of me hiding what I felt. 6 months when all I did was try to make you see that she was the girl of your dreams. 6 months of me acting like I saw you as just some random kid. 6 months of me, telling myself that you would never see me as anything more but the quiet girl. But it was between those six months that I fell in love with you more than I ever thought it was possible to love anyone. I found myself thinking about you in the most awkward times. When I felt like my life was falling apart, I wished that you would have been the one telling me that everything would be okay. When i was happy and i wanted to share my joy with someone, I wished that you were there so that I would hug you and tell you how happy I was. I made so many wishes that I was sure were never going to come true because I always thought that you were wayyyyy out of my league. I felt insecure because I knew she was smarter than me and that you had known her for so long. I wanted to tell you how much I loved you but I always felt like you deserved someone better than me. It hurt me so bad each time she talked about how she loved you and how u were nice to her. And even though I never said it out loud, I wished that you would not love her. She was my friend and I know i was wrong for thinking that but all I wanted was you and I knew I would never have you.

Our friendship grew gradually, and we were now "besties" we would talk about the most random things and I would never get bored of talking to you. She didn't know that even at 12 am, you were the one I would stay up texting. She didn't know that I was starting to have you to myself. I guess I am a bad friend for ruining something that she wanted for so long, but is it my fault that you are so sexy? I couldn't help but fall for you charm. Something about you made me question everything I had ever thought about guys. I was still in a relationship because I knew I would not have anyone if I broke up with the guy I was going out with. And truth be told, I feel like he knew I liked you. But even then, I still wanted to be around you because you made me feel so alive in ways that I could not even explain.

I'm not sure whether I got tired of hiding what I felt, or whether I just wanted to take a chance, but I finally got the nerves to break up with the guy I was dating I knew that I had no chance of ever being your girl, but I was ok with being your best friend. Looking back at it now, I think that was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I decided to take a risk and it was worth it. We became so close to where you were the first and last person I would talk to every day. I learned about the things that made you happy and I let you see me beyond the quiet girl I was. I wished that maybe one day you would realize that I was madly in love with you and that I didn't care about her or what she felt towards you. I wanted to be the one who would make you happy and I did everything I could to prove to you that I was a loyal "best friend"

I didn't realize how attached I was to you until one day I felt hurt because You didn't respond to my text. I felt so empty without you and I remember feeling like I had been wasting my time all along. But you eventually came back and I felt alive again. I knew something was going on when we started having cute conversations, We would talk about our day... but it wasn't the same anymore. It was as if behind all our endless texts there was a hidden message. I remember the morning when I woke up to catch my flight and I saw the text you had sent me. At that moment I only wanted one thing. You. I wanted to hug you and to cry on our shoulder because I had never felt someone care about me the same way that you did. I wished that I had the courage to tell you what I felt but i was too scared. Even when I was away from home, I felt happy knowing that I had someone who cared so much about me. Sadly, I did something stupid and I remember telling you and thinking that you would not care too much. But I was wrong, you made me realize that you cared a lot about me. One that that you said that I still hold dearly is when you said that I was your world and you didn't want to see it crushing down.

As time went by, things became clear and I just wanted one thing.. YOU! i will never forget when you told me that you liked me too!! I remember wondering whether I was dreaming. I remember how I felt when you said that this whole time you had feelings for me and not her. The joy that filled my heart was overpowering. You told me everything that I ever wanted to hear. You made me regain all my lost hope. We both had so much to share and express our love. I could finally tell you every thought that crossed my mind and I was not scared of hiding my feelings for you.

Today when you held my hand. I couldn't get myself to believe that it was actually happening. I can’t tell you how much I wanted that moment to last forever. When you asked me out, I know I took long to respond, it was not because I had any doubts, but because It was a lot to take in. I never imagined a day where you  would love me as much as you. I know theres a lot of stuff that might be keeping us from being where we want to be, but i am wiling to stick through and make this work. I hope you are willing to do the same thing...