Yellow Intoxication

Staring at the bowl 

placed in front of my folded arms,

I begin to wonder,

Can anybody see?

Does anybody notice what I do

At the family dinner table?

Do they realise my tactics,

My distractions, and my lies?

The smell is intoxicating,

Choking me, strangling me.

The air smells strongly

Of sickly sweetness, 

The only thing I can smell.

The bright yellow bits,

Clinging to the side of the plate.

The vibrant colours that

Shine straight into my eyes.

I can't take this any more,

I have to leave the table,

Before I leave myself.

I have to go, I can't stay any longer.

But I can't. I am trapped inside

This circular-looking furniture,

The walls are caving in.

The room spins, but I have to stay.

The brightness I can't take,

The smell, poisoning my fresh air.

The stares from the invisible eyes,

They are all I see.

I cut them out, gauge out the eyes,

I stab them till they're small,

I cut them till I've had enough,

And the walls say it's enough.

The eyes are still staring,

Into my soul, the fierce glares,

The hatred clear in their 

Glossy, yellow eyes.

The walls let me go, 

But not for too long.

Because soon it's time to say goodbye,

And have the walls close in again.

Is this what they mean,

When they call me weird?

Is this why I'm an outsider,

Even in my own class?

Author's Note

What's your interpretation of the walls, the yellow-looking bits, and the story behind this poem? Let me know! :)