Given

We slide betwixt the spaces

Leaving hints and little traces

Of blood and love that lost the fight

To emptiness and endless spite

Vampire and leech

Are what the inbred teach

But we become the angels

Fallen far beyond a divine reach

It all was beautiful

But we took a gamble

And the loss that we incurred

Was enough to create shambles

I give up

I gave up

I’ve given

Reviews

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Wow! This progression of verb tenses is awesome:
"I give up
I gave up
I’ve given"

Life is like a game...we gamble...we fight...we win or lose. And everytime we feel the failure inside us, we create our own disaster. And then we give up.

I hope that in due time these short statements will become longer into:
I give up...all my fears.
I gave up...all my sins.
I’ve given...all to Him.

*It all was beautiful---- How about... It was all beautiful.

Nice poem.

[Commanda Panda]

Hail Thoth, creator of language both written and spoken!

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

???

[Commanda Panda]

I'm joking with you. Thanks for the kudos. Love you!

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

:)

[Emily B]

our wings will heal in time

we will fly again

[Vria P Crow]

Hick Town

1. Inbred

Honestly, I grew up in the country so I understand the concepts of what goes on. I use to want to stay in my hometown forever until now.

CONTENT

1. Beautiful.
2. Intelligence.
3. Honest

Vocabular I Enjoy

1. Betwixt
2. Vampire
3. Leech

Nice work:D