All my lifeA Story by Marcie
If you have a sturggle that keeps following you year after year this is for you....
All My Life_____________!!!!
“All my life I had to fight. I had to fight my daddy. I had to fight my uncles. I had to fight my brothers. A girl child ain't safe in a family of men, but I ain't never thought I'd have to fight in my own house! I loves Harpo, God knows I do. But I'll kill him dead 'fo I let him beat me.” The movie ‘The color purple’
I’m having a “All My Life” moment!! Some of us have the great commission of carrying burdens that God have no doubt we can bear. He trust you enough to give you,*This Thing* that consistently wears you out, lock you into a fetal position, and leaves you saying “I’m tired of being tired” Why Lord you ask?… “its because l love you” He replies. Yes this boggles the mind, BUT when you get through this moment, you will gain an enormous amount of strength, experience, hope and faith that you can pass on to somebody who have just arrived at the place you once were. Jesus notify Peter that the Devil wanted to sift him “But I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren” Luke 22:32. WHEN is the key word.
Therefore, this place were you can’t understand why? Why your praying fervently, feverishly but God remains calm and cold. Why your moving but going nowhere. Why you have to push until all your strength is gone, at least that’s how you feel. Why your asking and not receiving. Why your seeking but cant find the answers. Why your knocking and the door won’t open. But instead it is slammed shut in your face. Not to worry this will all end. WHEN it does don’t forget to build up your sisters & brothers.
I began this journal by quoting Sofia from “The color Purple” not only for her words but also her character. She played an assertive woman who didn’t back down from a fight and if anybody picked on her, she would beat them twice as hard as they beat her. She was also extremely honesty with her words and emotions. If she had struggles, she told it. If somebody hurts her, she told it. If she’s mad, trust me you’ll know. And yes it got her into trouble because she rub people the wrong way. But, Sofia is a visible reminder that we don’t have to take everything lying down, we can learn to stand up and fight.
So when lies, betrayal and false promises come up against you, don’t stop, keep it moving. “Yea, though I walk thru the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil” when your in hell keep moving, its not the time to stop and feel sorry for yourself, nope its not time to wallow in your “all my life” moment. It’s time to tell the enemy what you think about him and keep moving. Thru the tears, heartache, pain and disappointments, don’t stop! Its a ploy to cause you to sink in that moment. But If you can’t pull it together quickly, call your life line, everybody needs somebody. You cant clap with one hand. See clearly with one eye. Walk straight with one leg. God said “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you..” he knew this day was fast approaching when no matter how prayed up you are, how much anointing you have, that something was gonna come along and throw you overboard.
So with tears falling all over the place. A heart that hurts so much because you can't believe, how badly life keeps beating you and cause you to feel like this, But God is saying, I love you. I got you covered, I already prayed for you, you can do this, you can defeat the enemy at his own game, just keep going. Yes, some days are harder than others but your still alive, right now you can't talk about the bruises cause they hurt like hell. But your day of release is coming…….. you’ll see!!!!!
© 2012 Marcie
AboutWriting takes me to a place where I can express myself without question. It allows me to talk myself through the tough days, express myself in ways I can't articulate verbally and encourage others to.. more..