The killing floor

The killing floor

A Poem by Island Hippy


my soul cried
such a sweet thing

like lambs
to slaughter.

you command
the killing floor

your tongue cutting
me down to size

while I am left
a bloody mess

a heart, out
side it's body

still waiting for
you to notice me.






© 2017 Island Hippy



My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

Deep in its hurting Izzy. A flowing digestible pathos filled piece.

Posted 5 Months Ago


Island Hippy

5 Months Ago

Mahalo John
Damn. Now this is intense stuff. Even after being leveled our insides are still screaming to be noticed. Verbal warfare. Never fun.

"you command
the killing floor"

That is a powerful line and overall a sick piece Izzy. Nicely done.


Posted 5 Months Ago


Island Hippy

5 Months Ago

Mahalo duff I appreciate your visit.
duff

5 Months Ago

You bet my friend!
ah... sometimes, the love never sees what's already found before eyes until it's gone. today, half of this world only care of having sex. once you gave your s***s to your partner, he/she hardly stays in your life for long, may be, it's just life and we -- the humans -- are fond of new and luxurious things. we need new things every day to keep life running.. and it makes us all blind enough not to see the poor heartaches or the "value of old things" we walked through. ah... sometimes, males ditch/dig on females so sometimes, it's nasty females who cheat on filthy males. that's life... and it's certainly such a "KILLING FLOOR". xo

very interesting and eye-catching stuff it is.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

Aloha, it is nice to read how someone interprets a piece, it gives poetry life I think. This is not .. read more
Wórdsmíth

6 Months Ago

'a'ole pilikia.
i would ev'n like to know the name of the song, if it's okay with ya.
Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

It's an old blues song originally by Howlin Wolf, but here is a link to my favorite version of it, f.. read more
one has to be rejected so many times before success in dating lol but at least we are not from the mantid family where the female bites off the male head after sex.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

Mahalo Andrew, that made me chuckle.
Growing up is torture. Maybe why it's called growing up. When you're ready to be noticed, you'll be noticed. Though these days love is just a click away.
Where has the fun gone.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

Mahalo Paul, I really appreciate your time :)
The tongue cutting down the soul like a helpless lamb analogy in reference to relationships is written with such spiritual awareness, nicely done.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

Mahalo Nui, I appreciate your kind comment J.
The slaughter of purity. It feels like that.
Lambs are so innocent yet they are made meals of.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

Mahalo Ana
Ana Papaya

6 Months Ago

You're welcome Izzy
amazing write!! i love the brutality and chaotic vulnerability you've incorporated into this!!

a very creative take on those whom lack any empathy with their callous tongues. brilliantly captures bitter betrays all can relate to.

thank you for sharing - x

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

Aloha :) thank you so much. I agree the tongue can be lethal. I appreciate your comment. Izzy
ohh man! how many time as a young man did i feel this pain and helplessness ... yeouch ..and i'm sorry ..but young ladies don't need words ..its that look that chops off the legs as neatly as a cleaver ;}
great stuff ..well said .. the economy of words is admirable
E.
ps very dramatic title ..it effected me the whole way through .. making the cut down so much more deep and horrific

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

Mahalo, I appreciate your thoughtful review and generous visits. Izzy
A WOW piece containing softness and hardness equally. Strongly expressive. Your words are a feast to my literary eyes tortured by too many words too often. The agonized journalist. ..Writing creatively and letting it go is my only escape
OR reading awesome poems by felllows.
Take care, R.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Island Hippy

6 Months Ago

I'm sorry I overlooked this. Mahalo Nui I appreciate your thoughtful words.
BermudaBoy

6 Months Ago

No problem at all
Course

First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe

Advertise Here
Advertise Here
Want to advertise here? Get started for as little as $5

Stats

331 Views
16 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on April 4, 2017
Last Updated on April 4, 2017

Author

Island Hippy
Island Hippy

HI



About
Akua, Aloha, Ohana, Aina more..

Writing
Home Home

A Poem by Island Hippy



Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


All You Need All You Need

A Poem by Kesha


Burn Burn

A Poem by Neal S


Inamorata Inamorata

A Poem by Neal S