Rhyme?

My heart is hurting

I can't even rhyme.

Did I misunderstand?

Did you stop caring?

Did you ever at all?

I'm so full of anger 

I can't even rhyme.

I wasted my time.

I wasted my hope.

I wasted my love.

The pain is too much

Why can't I rhyme?

If only you'd come back.

If only time could reverse.

If only...

but...

then again...

Roses are red

violets are blue...

and so it seems, I'm through with you.

Author's Note

Sounds more like a break-up poem, but really about a broken friendship.

I'm not sure if my point got across right, you'd probably have to know me as a writer and kno I usually rhyme in my poems.

Reviews

[TheFemininePad]

This is a great poem Mandeline. You don't have to force things to rhyme to construct excellent poems. I think it should be more about the emotions and experiences that you are conveying to your reader. You demonstrate this so well. I didn't feel like it sounds like a break-up poem. I felt its more about a message of a broken friendship that you are really hurt by.

[therisa]

Personally, too many poets try to force things to rhyme, when they write, which leaves the readers with a very stilted verse to read. Mandeline, as you have proven, you don't need to rhyme, to have an expressive poem.

In many ways, a broken friendship is a break-up between two people, who once where were close. The pain, is the same just we give it a different title. Hoping in writing this verse, you are finding a constructive outlet for your pain and anger.

[Rebel Angel]

I think you do see that you are not rhyming, the repeated use of the word was a really good way of emphasing that. It felt a little angry and hurt, and now that i know its about a broken friendship it shows in your righting. The pain you feel at the loss of a friend is a big one, and one that only heals with time and understanding.