They, Who Sit Alone

The party is over.
Everyone’s going home.
As they walk they remember,
the girl sitting alone.

The music was blaring.
Excitement filled the air,
but why was the girl, 
sitting alone over there?

They think of themselves
how exciting they are;
not a care in the world, 
as they get in the car.

They begin to drive,
recalling the night,
laughing at the girl;
such a pathetic sight.

They call her a loner,
a loser- a freak
not because they are better,
but because they are weak.

For they cannot forget 
their darkest hour,
where they once sat alone,
like a sad, wilting flower.

They will not forget,
as they pull over and sigh,
how familiar it was-
the look in her eye.

The party is over.
Everyone’s going home.
As they cry they remember-
the girl sitting alone.

Author's Note

Any comments, questions, concerns, thoughts on life?
Side Note: This pictures not mine...it was a result of google image search.

Reviews

[Alana McGuire]

not because they are better,
but because they are weak

Those were my favorite lines because they're so true. I really enjoyed this a lot. It hits home and I think you covered it very well.

Definitely was a pretty nicely done write.
Like the simple ABCB rhyme scheme, it really worked well for the flow.
One of the highlights of the poem is that you were able to keep the flow and rhyme going throughout the poem... not many writers can do that. Consider yourself having abilities.
Possible criticism to draw though is don't be afraid to expand your use with terminology and vocabulary. Most people feel daunted by larger words. Also, explore and experiment, get a little wild when it comes to metaphorical devices. Lots of writers have a problem with "telling v.s. showing", so no worries, it's a common thing.
Just try to use metaphorical devices and researching other techniques to use in place of explaining that someone walks to their car and etc. Poetry is for people who like to feel what their reading... it's kinda a standard goal among poetry to make people feel emotion while reading poetic works.
Overall though, found this work to be an awesome job. Gotta give it a 95/100. Great work, and keep it up. Hope to read more of your stuff

[Katie]

I absolutely loved this piece. It flowed beautifully, and I really got the meaning of this! I can really relate, but I never knew how to put this into words! Well written. :)

[~* Wonderstruck *~]

loved this (:

[JRB]

nicely put felt, the image of pain and love is always hurt,,,,,,

[Beverly Jane]

Really good, it's something that is relatable. The words find their way into your heart and makes you remember what it's like to ache inside or reminds you of how you are hurting at that moment. Thats how deep the words are. Nice. :)

[Harmonica winds]

okay this has to be my favorite so far, so much in this write. I really liked this, There are so many people that could connect with this write. Nicely done.