SOUVENIRS FROM BLISSES HITCH

sleep is the dream

projection holds entirely to this belief

that hope is a place to be seen

though miles gained while the ideal slept

a peace of mind reaches safety

forgotten for the lie that is me

a stubborn truth covered in comfort

tossed while the rinse was final

the illusion of living charmed for real

below the cut of hammered steel

fearless is the lack of will to conceal

a wish is simply a slight pull of the wheel

sleep walking my sorrow still

beyond this memory or this dream

left in a place far and in between

heaven and hell

                  

Terry D’Arcy-Ryan

                                                                                      

                                          

                                                             

                                                                                                                                                                        

Reviews

[Weeping willow]

Wonderfully expressed, as we balance our lives between heaven and hell ;-]

[DoormanDan]

Interesting, to say the least! I did enjoy this, but some things about it make it hard to fully understand. For instance, the syntax is some of the lines is a bit too construed to come across as anything other than forced and clumsy, and several parts of the poem (such as the opening portion) consist of lines that just need to be rewritten and polished in order to both make more sense and be organized. Overall, this has potential, but it needs a bit more work put in for that potential to fully shine through. I hope I haven't come across as too harsh in this review (that's not my intention at all), and I hope that you can find something to help you out here. Regardless, keep on writing!

[Pete]

i love this. very creatively done. we really do need to hold onto those souvenirs and take them out as reminders. every now and then we need to toss another log on the fire of our happiness and fan the flames of hope. i really like the metaphor and imagery in your wording - impeccable as usual. i want to hop a ride in that car and on the back of your words. cool pics complete the package. one of my favorites of yours i think but then again how many times have i said that? i've long since run out of scores to give you. awesome write Terry! you rock ... :)

-- P.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Damn Pete, can't ask for a better review than that. The car pic is great I chose that one since looks like about 100 in the fast lane. Because we are always in a hurry no matter where were going. The theme here is that yes its all a set up for happily ever after and yet we still embrace it. Though I am alright with it and I don't regret a thing, just taking it all in. Thank you for the best reviews.

Sheer Terror

[Coyote Poetry]

You are right my friend.
"a wish is simply a slight pull of the wheel
sleep walking my sorrow still
beyond this memory or this dream
left in a place far and in between
heaven and hell"
I liked the photos. I liked the old wisdom. Dreams are the set-up for real life. Thank you my friend for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Thank you for the great review I do appreciate it.

Sheer Terror

[Coyote Poetry]

I enjoyed this poem and you are welcome my friend..

[Nipplegrinder]

There is a great deal of unease in this poem about "hope".

*sleepwalking my sorrow still*
Remarkable line.

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Yes, I would say that sums it up beautifully, an unease regarding hope. Seems no matter what you do it always comes creeping back in. Thank you for reading and the review.

Sheer Terror

[Alao Taiwo]

hope is a place to be seen. hmmm. thank you. i like the pictures too

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Thank you very much

[sette]

a nice piece of writing about sleep and dreams it had captured the work of the mind while sleeping

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Thank you Sette for another amazing review.

Sheer Terror

[sette]

you are most welcome

[wordman]

and you done it in a 50 buick and a 53 ford,sleep sometimes it`s illusive,sometimes at our bekon call
and sleepwalking,more often than not

[TerryDarcy-Ryan akaSheerTerror]

Thank you wordman

Sheer Terror

[wordman]

you`re welcome