Death of the Phoenix

Smothering, in my own damnation
This curse brings, my ruination
The devil laughs, at this demise
At the swimming, in tears and lies

I've been built up, and burned down, countless times, in this life
And the strength I had of gods of old, I'll no longer summon in this strife
I no longer see the point, of showing the world what willpower is
A battle fought, as old as time, for love, I'd die for this

In these ashes is my final resting place
Cradled in my remains, floating in to space
Or maybe I'll fall, even further down
Does it matter, without you, I'm just the clown

I gave more in a year than others give in a lifetime
But I walk alone still, in my thoughts, a dangerous state of mind
When the fight is dead inside, theres no reason to stay
All that matters, the reason, the light, I know I hold no sway

What good is rising when you're but a shadow, up against the wall
When the mere thought of happiness, seems a joke, on rusty nails I fall
Over and over and over again, I've always known my role
The jester for God, the success of hell, whichever stole her soul

Happy endings are for you not me, I accept this part of destiny
If you walked in these shoes, for a few days, you'd believe the hurt, the ache that stays
Bury me deep down in the ground, no need for prayers, no need for sounds
I thought I was more than I really am, part of love, away from the damned

When your angel turns her eyes from you, shivering in the downfall of grace
And she gives her love to another, you realize you have no face
When you've lived enough life to know theres no other saints watching over you
They've given up, as I have on myself, what I wanted, can no longer be true

Reviews

[Enchanted-Raven]

Powerful sad read,I can't offer words like...you will get past this, someone else will come along etc...truth is we just don't know what the future holds for any of us. I will say though you were left with a precious gift, give all your love to her and life will do the rest. I wish you peace and love dear poet :) x

[Teddybearlee]

Thank you for the read and the comment and sentiment, ah peace, one day again maybe, right? :)

[Enchanted-Raven]

I'm sure it will come :) x

[John Alexander McFadyen]

This is a poignant piece I can relate to having lost the love of my life and the mother of my children to another. You capture the sentiment so fully in this!