My Dearest

On the eve of an amber sunrise

I set a foot forward into darkness

An unknown path for my new life

I leave, back turned, away from familiar bliss

This is my choice, one of mine own fate

 

I built upon this path,

I faced many obstacles and difficulties

But I knew life’s only the first draft

There is no rerun, only this originally

Forward, in wealth and struggles on this path

 

My Dearest, I never once forgot you

Our bond forged from adversity

No matter what, we pulled through

Even as I left for another city

My heart never left that place

 

My Dearest, through the hardest times

Through times that tested values and beliefs

Even with the mountain I’d yet to climb,

I held you close to my heart, my will increase

My determination beyond measures

 

I left the place I knew

To know that the choices I make

To know that myself alone pulled through

No matter how my heart ache

I held you closest to my heart

 

My Dearest, I harbor no ill will

Only despair and betrayal

In my time away, time stood still

I felt decades had passed away

But even so, this pain inflicted is so close

Closer to my heart than anything else before

 

My Dearest, what changed you?

I was the closest to your side

Yet was that bond cut so easily through?

I left, but still I chose to abide

But still, I grappled to that place I left

 

My Dearest, here I lay my heart

In what might be cryptic, and foreign

But this is true for the thrown dart

The crippling betrayal I am now in

 

I pushed through the days relentlessly

To show myself and to let you see

Where I could go, and how far I could reach

But even so, that dearest bond was breached

 

I lay beside that thrown dart

And ask, “What changed?”

The dart says with a sigh,

“The distance that which she threw me”

 

I’ve jumped oceans, and traveled the darkest places for you

I’ve pushed onward through the storm that relented, unyielding

I’ve persevered to write in this first draft, the one only original

But still, not even a puddle has been crossed for me

 

I’ve counted the stars to keep my patience

I’ve memorized road maps to distract my attention

I’ve befriended countless to stow away my heart

But still, the dagger plunged deeper than I’d thought

 

I’ve turned away from ideas and paths

I’ve run away to realize my true self

I’ve endured countless battles

But still, not one cut on your arm is for me

 

Words are pretty, as are lies

I’ve reached out, but with nil response many times

I felt feelings beyond measure,

But still, it all stemmed from deception

 

The strings of fate had wound us together

Binding us into an alloy stronger than steel

But even so, you chose to rust

But even so, this forged bond turned to dust

 

I’ve always known I’d been a puppet

With strings attached, I knew the glisten of them

I’ve always known the deceptions

With beauty attached, I knew all along

 

But I chose to stay, I chose to not walk away

My Dearest, though I had been shackled in chains

I left it be, for possibly all eternity

Because My Dearest, I loved you like no other

 

But eventually, I will walk away

Eventually, the strings will be cut

Eventually, the draft will keep on going

And I fear where you may be then

 

But My Dearest, you’ll do fine

After all, this is your long due fine