Black Dawn

The black dawn rises
Silently from the East
As the cold day opens
Revealing misery
The death night passes
Quickly without a trace
As noon takes over
This time forsaken race

The sun burns slowly
or so it seems
But life is going
By you in between

The evening comes
Like a tiger on the prowl
and old age
Puts lines upon your brow
The twilight whispers
Agonizing screams
As the sandman blisters
Your mind with his dreams

The black crow watches
With wise and narrow eyes
He knows what's hiding
In our souls
Is sorrow in disguise

Reviews

[Alskar]

Brilliant sense of time throughout this poem, 'death night passes', 'twilight whispers', 'old age', 'noon'. I wonder who the 'you' is you are speaking to in the poem, it sounds like you are accusing them of wasting their life away 'but life is going/by you inbetween', which is very interesting and well displayed by the use of time. And you use stunning imagery, 'sandman blisters', and 'twilight whispers'.

[A.E. Surdam]

Exquisite imagery. I so very much loved this one! :)

[HopelesslyDevoted]

incredible poem! emotions are clearly seen through your words.

[State of Grace]

Absolutely beautiful and amazing! Awesome job! :)

[Blue Moon Ice Cream]

Brilliant imagery. "As the sandman blisters your mind with his dreams"--loved that part. Good job.

[Kathryn]

very dark, with beautiful imagery. Brilliantly written, well done :)

[disconnectedspirit]

listen i have showed you love and mercy, I am not I am not black, I have told you i enjoy your writing, and just showed you sympathy of your pain due to the abortion..I am not dark, I am not the anti christ, you are just a bitter jealous woman that can not have a man who does not love her..you are blaming something that is not my fault..you can not force someone to love you sm