''The Accountant''

A small man in a black suit and gray tie pay's a visit to Hank's diner. He introduces himself as Hanks accountant explaining his books don't balance. But Hank not so sure he is all that he makes out

''The Accountant''

No matter what the time of day was, the lady on the Sun Drop lemonade clock was always smiling. '' Have you had your lemonade today'' the advertisement on its red face asks.

Her teeth have yellowed with age and the paint is peeling off her 50's style Auburn hair behind the dust covered glass. ''Made with real Lemon Juice'' she beams into the diner ''Only five cents for a large bottle''. Just below her a color picture of a smiling Robert Nixon the only president ever to resign looking tanned and relaxed has a spider-less cobweb floating between its wooden frame and the red and chrome1956 Seeburg Juke box that sits in a dimly lit corner. Patsy Cline is oozing ''Sweet Dreams of you'' out of its speakers.; it seems to dance in time to the rhythm of the melody caught up in a haze of cigarette smoke and peculating coffee steam. Above the door a Blue neon sign for Coca Cola fizzles and cracks into life creating a stroboscopic light show onto the checker board floor.

The Sun Drop clocks big hand clicks slowly into place and the Diner door opens as the last strike marks 8pm. A small man in a black suit and gray tie steps in, he pauses briefly in the neon light and adjusts his thick black glasses, in his left hand he is carrying a small brown well worn leather

case. The kind a banker or an I.R.S investigator might use to carry official papers , he takes a moment to rub his shoes on the back of his pants checking each in turn to make sure he has removed the dust of the street off his 400 dollar Oxfords. To his right an elderly man is sitting at a table hunched over a cold cup of coffee, he smiles and nods to him but gets no response. The old man is static and vacant in his expression the cigarette he was smoking has long since gone out leaving a bridge of gray ash between his fingers and the glass tray. The small man shrug’s his shoulders in an effort to remove the feeling of discord from the act of being ignored has given him and moves forward into the diner with a renewed spring in his step. He waltzes delicately between the empty tables as if he is competing in a dance contest, his feet move in tune with the slickness of a Saturday afternoon musical leading man, a Gene Kelly parody only without the rain.

He slips effortlessly into a semicircular middle booth covered with blood read leather seats and faded gold painted arm rests, after placing his case perfectly center of the table, he punches in A 23 into the Chrome Juke box selector mounted on the the wall. Patiently he waits as the dying melodic over-tunes of Ms Cline fade into silence.

His finger then becomes a conductors virtual baton as he begins to lead his choice of music into

an orchestral requiem, he leans back into his seat and closes his eye's letting the sounds of ''The blue Danube'' by Johann Strauss caress him like lovers arms. He ignores the first '' Hey Buddy'' with an air of contempt continuing his imaginary musical direction with his dainty digit.

The second intrusion however makes him place his hand upon his case, the expression of his disdain is evident upon his face, slowly his humming ceases and he opens his eye's.

'' Ah! Mr Henry Roe I presume'' he says looking up at the man standing beside his table.

''Do I know you?'' he replies with a concerned frown.

The small man leans forward an offers out his hand '' Mr Thanatos, I am an accountant pleased to meet you''

'' The name is Hank ,buddy'' the man replies '' Didnt you see the sign as you came in, 'Hank's Diner!''

Mr Thanatos looks to his case and rubs it's edge with his thumb, he takes a deep breath and sighs ''Of course, Hank! I'm so sorry to have made that mistake, its just I have your name as Henry on my ledger, but no matter I shall address you as Hank if you prefer''

''Who did you say you worked for?'' Hank asks him.

Mr Thanatos clicks open the two locks on his brief case in turn, the sounds of Strauss begin to fade and from inside he lifts out a black book. He places the book in front of him and from his jacket pocket he produces to white cotton gloves. Each is slipped over his hands with methodical precision , Hank watches in awe struck silence like he is about to see an illusion performed by a master magician. Mr Thanatos smiles at him as he pulls the hand ware over his fingers like a surgeon.

'' I don’t believe I said who I worked for'' he eventually replies.

'' Are you from the I.R.S?'' Hank asks him .

'' Oh no!'' he say's '' I'm much more important than that''

''The Government?''

Mr Thanatos tilts his head to the right and places his finger and thumb under his chin in a moment of thought stirred by Hanks last question. '' Hnmmm!'' he ponders for a moment his eyes looking heavenward. '' Yes, lets say the Government'' he smiles.

Hank is a big man, his checkered shirt is barely containing the 30 extra pounds he has hanging over the front of his jeans, a casualty of his own past success, an obese sweaty ex football jock. Over the years he's let himself go he knows that, so he tries to hide what little hair he has left under a greasy blue New York base ball hat, and covers his bulging midriff with a dirty apron. Mr Thanatos gestures to him to sit down facing him but Hank has trouble squeezing his giant frame between the back rest and the booths table. After a lot of grunting and wheezing he finally make's it in. Mr Thanatos then pushes the case to one side and centers the book in the middle of the table. '' Excuse me one moment Hank'' he whispers. Once more he pushes a letter and a number into the jukebox control selection. Again he waits and closes his eyes ready for the music to commence. Strauss has been replaced by Bach's Orchestral Suite number 2 . '' Ah, a favorite of mine'' he say's with a hint of humor in his voice ''Do you like Bach?'' he asks Hank.

''Hank shrugs his shoulders and grunts.

''Of course not'' Mr Thanatos sighs.

Hank leans forward breaking into his personal space, his breath stinks of beer and cigarettes. ''Where are you getting this s****y music from Buddy, I don’t remember putting those records in the Jukebox''

Mr Thanatos pulls a pure white linen handkerchief from his inside coat pocket and covers his mouth and nose, his face pulls a dry gag brought on by Hanks malodorous habits.

''And what sort of a name is that , you ain’t from around these parts I'll wager'' Hank spits.

''Is it Italian? Huh!, yeah that’s it your a made up guy, I knew it your Mafia, tell me I'm right''

''Geek'' Mr Tanatos speaks from behind his hankie.

'' What did you call me!'' Hank screams at him, his face instantly contorted in to a visage of hate.

Mr Thanatos recoils at the barrage of verbal venom Hank has just secreted at him , slowly he removes his face cover and sniffs the air around him like an anxious mere cat.

Quietly he controls himself, '' Greek''

''Wha-!' Hank mouths at him.

''My name is Greek, it means D-'

Hank slaps the table with a loud bang and chokes into laughter before he finishes speaking.

''I really don't give a s**t what it means buddy-Ha!'' - '' So you ain’t Mafia then''

Mr Thanatos shakes his head.

''And you ain’t a made up guy, or a guinea b*****d?''

Again he shakes his head to indicate no.

''Then what the hell do you want with me?'' Hank asks, shifting in his seat.

''Simple'' Mr Thanatos replies '' Your books don't balance''

''Book's?, what f*****g books are you talking about''

''Please! Mr Roe'' Mr Thanatos replies clicking his tongue in distaste '' There is no need for such profanity''

'' Show me!, is this it?'' Hank says pointing at the black book.

''Yes'' Mr Thanatos indicates with his hand '' Shall we begin Henry?, I mean Hank'' he corrects himself.

''I ain’t got no money!'' Hank says as he watches the little man carefully open the book '' Look at this place'' he points with open arms. '' Take a good look buddy, Since they opened up the new highway four years ago no one come's here anymore. I've been here for twenty this fall, times was before, the truckers would stop here, me and Millie, my ex wife, we bought this place in 1973, she liked that old fifties style of décor you can see. She swore it helped to sell more burgers an fries , cant say I agreed but we had a good thing going. Then all went to s**t, I'm lucky if I make 50 dollars every other day. So like I say Buddy, I ain't got no money and this place just looks as tired as I feel''

Mr Thanatos listened as Hank ranted on about how everything had gone wrong for him and how his luck had turned sour, blaming everything and everybody but himself. Eventually he trailed off and went quiet. Mr Thanatos adjusted his glasses and looked at his wristwatch '' Good, you’ve finished'' he said. ''Shall we?''

Hank shrugged his shoulders and seemed to give in, his body went limp and he slouched down into the seat. ''Do you have a cigarette?''

'' I don't smoke'', Mr Thanatos said ''and besides those things will kill you'' Hank watched him as he allowed himself a little smile ''Now to business''

The sounds of Bach continued to play as the small man began to read from the book.

'' lets see'' He said, ''Mr Henry Roe'', he shook his head and pointed to the page ''sorry, Hank!, Born 1945 Boston Massachusetts eldest son of Irish immigrants Henry Senior and Mary Ellen Roe. Well behaved baby, went to St Mary’s kindergarten West Roxbury, entered first grade aged 6, pretty much a normal childhood, wouldn’t you agree Hank?''

''Suppose'' Hank mused uninterested '' Can we just get to it Buddy, how much do I owe?''

''All in good time Hank, all in good time''

The more Mr Thanatos went on about his adolescence and early years the more Hank slumped into himself, he seemed to go on about cockamamie things such as when he stole ten dollars from his fathers wallet in 1960 when he was 15 years old but was caught out when hisparents found out him and his best friend Tommy Williamson were living it up on soda pop and ice cream at Baxters drug store in town. Hank had to pay restitution by chopping wood after school for two weeks. And stupid other stuff that he had all but forgotten. Moments blended into an hour, Hank was slowly loosing patience. '' Do you mind if I get up and move around'' eventually he asked.

''Not at all'' Mr Thanatos agrees and continues on reading from the black book, he talks about Hank's collage years and about how him and his buddies stole some beer, and about the time he got into a fight and ended up in jail for a week because he was ratted on over the theft of the alcohol. ''How do you know all this stuff about me?'' he inquires of Mr Thanatos as he pauses his agitated pacing for a moment.

The small man looks up showing an expression of slight annoyance at Hank's interruption.

'' Everyone knows the Government keeps files Hank, that’s what they do''

''I guess..'' Hank relents.

''Good!, now lets continue, you met your wife at collage? ''

''Yeah'' Hank smiled ''Millicent was a real looker that Marilyn Monroe type you know what I mean, she could have had anybody you know, but she picked me, dunno why. I wasn’t the most handsome guy on the football team, but I made her laugh. Maybe that was it.''

''You loved her'' Mr Thanatos agrees

''You bet ya!'' Hank laughs '' Boy did we make sweet music together'' he puts his finger to the side of his nose and wink's at Mr Thanatos ''You get my drift'' then his face drops to a frown as he evaluates events of his past, quietly he whispers to himself. '' Like I said before, we had a good thing going until all the s**t started''

''You got married and bought this place'' Mr Thanatos says breaking Hank away from his day dream.

''Yeah, like I said, 1973 it was. Got hitched in June that year and moved here two months after her Daddy threw us out. He never liked me much, but he gave Millie five grand when we was leaving, I guess he was investing on the prospect of us never coming back. We just hit the road in my old Ford and headed along route 66 to a new life, or so we thought in California. We pulled in here after a day or so on the road to get something to eat, got talking to '' Hank'' who owned the place, found out he was keen to sell, Millie loved the idea so we bought the Diner and kept the name for $5,000.00 all the money we had''

Henry watched as Mr Thanatos leaned back into his seat and crossed his arms waiting for more he was sure.

'' For three years we, did OK, truckers put the word around that we made good chilli, reasonable burgers and cheap coffee'' he continued '' Money was rollin in, but!''

''But what Henry ?'' Mr Thanatos asks. For a moment Henry seems unwilling to recall anymore of heartache from his past, it becomes evident on his face. '' She wanted kid's'' he says fighting back a tear that’s intruding from his wide eyes.

'' But I couldn’t give her any, you know what I mean'' he admits to Mr Thanatos who nods a quiet look of understanding. '' What did you do Henry when she found out?''

''That’s the point, I did nothing''

''Are you sure Henry, try to think back''

'' What do you mean?'' Henry chokes to him. Mr Thanatos just shrugs his shoulders '' You must have done something, said something-what?'' he replies.

''She hooked up with one a them trucker guy's behind my back'' Henry sniffs. ''It had bin goin on for a year before I caught them in my own bed''

''Then what?'' Mt Thanatos asks.

''Huh'' Henry smirks with an air of indigence '' Then nothing, they just ran off together. After we fought the next morning she was gone''

Mr Thanatos begins to tut loudly and unfold his arms, he pulls the book towards him and turns over a page, gently removing a piece of dust from the leaf between his finger and thumb with his glove. '' I'm afraid that’s not what it says here Henry'' he points.

'' What are you talking about!'' Henry shouts at him.

''Please Mr Roe, there is no need to get angry, the book clearly states that you shot your wife and her lover and buried them out in the desert, isn’t that so''

''Your lying!'' Henry screams '' How could you know that''

''I told you'' Mr Thanatos replies '' we keep files on everyone''

It was becoming clear to Henry that the little small man who was sitting in his diner was maybe not being as open as he should be about which part of the Government he was really from. He had no intention of doing any jail time, not for some two bit drunk trucker and his w***e lover, besides it had been ten years and no one even asked him where Millie had gone after he done it. Why should he let this little punk take him in, he could just as easily pop one in his head just like he had done for Millie. Who would know, he could just disappear and start over some wheres else he still had the gun, that very same one tucked into the back of his trousers. A place he always kept it during opening hours on account of some unsavory person maybe stopping by, kinda like this little a*****e''

''Ok, Ok I admit it, I killed them both, but god help me I loved that woman'' Henry finally says.

''But I ain’t goin to Jail, oh no sir''

Henry pulls the gun from his trousers and nervously points it at Mr Thanatos who raises his two arms limply towards the ceiling.

'' Oh Dear'' he sighs. '' I'm afraid your wasting your time Henry, and I don’t think your going to shoot me''

'' Don’t count on it Buddy', so far as I see it I ain’t got nothing to loose''

'' In that case I would like to make a request'' Mr Thanatos asks politely.

'' Ok, Sure'' Henry agrees ''I can grant you one last request I suppose''

''May I?'' the small man asks looking to his raised hands, Henry nods that its Ok to move them down.

''I suggest you take a look behind the counter Henry before you pull the trigger'' he points.

''This had not better not be trick'' Henry shouts waving his pistol.

''Please, just look''

The sounds of Bach are beginning to fade out as Henry anxiously diverts his gaze over the high counter, the shock of what he see's sends him reeling backwards crashing onto a table his gun spinning wildly away, his own body prostrate and lifeless on the ground is staring heavenward as dead as any corpse could be .

''What the Fu'..'' He screams '' What is this!'' he repeats '' What is happening to me''

''Please calm down Henry'' Mr Thanatos whispers. '' Come sit down again'' he gestures to the seat again.

Henry slides in looking frightened, '' You said you were an accountant, you lied to me Mr Thanatos, you said you were here for money. What is this, who are you really?''

'' First of all Henry I never once mentioned money, yes I did say I was an accountant and that is the truth. But its your life I take into account , I note down all that you do, the good things in one column and the bad in the other. Most peoples life books balance out before they die.

If you give to charity or help the needy for instance, those actions cancel out the lies or the bad things we might say about someone. Small things but they all add up, and the book must always balance this determines where you go,'' Mr Thanatos pauses and indicates with his finger up and down. '' yours did not, Do you understand Henry''

Henry nods back.

''Your book did not balance Mr Roe, because you did not pay for the murders, your sins, in this life so you must do so in the next. You are in the red Henry, So to speak, a debt must be paid''.

Henry watched wide eyed as Mr Thanatos took a pen from inside his jacket pocket, his mouth opened up into a silent scream as the small man zeroed out each column in turn.

'' There now Henry, all done'' he said with a smile, ''its been a pleasure doing business with you, goodbye'' and with that Henry was gone just like someone had blown out a candle, only a puff of smoke remained briefly in the air.

The Small man with the black suit and gray glasses moved round behind the counter and placed the Black ledger on Henry's dead body '' Account closed'' he said and patted it with his hand.

The Sun Drop Lemonade clocks big hand moved to 9.30pm, Mr Thanatos waltzed his way through the islands of tables towards the diners door, like a dancer in a Hollywood musical.

Quietly he slips into booth with blood red seats and faded gold painted arm rests, sitting across from him behind the table an elderly man haunches over a cold cup of coffee. Between his fingers a bridge of cigarette ash is delicately sitting onto the glass tray.

''Hello Mr Smith'' he smiles to him, the elderly man looks up bemused at who is speaking.

'' Who are you'' He asks, ''Do I know you?''

''My Name is Mr Thanatos I'm an accountant''

''I ain’t got no money the old mad snorts '' You got a cigarette?''

'' Oh no sorry, I don’t smoke'' He replies ''Do you like Mozart?''

''Wha'-'

'' Of course not, and besides those things will kill you'' he laughs out loud '' But wait, they already have! Ha!''

''What did you say your name was again'' the old man grunts''

''Mr Thanatos'' the small man sighs blowing out his cheeks '' And before you ask it's Greek meaning-Death''

As the night takes over and the moon is lost behind a wistful cloud the strains of Mozart float from inside a lonely diner just off route 66, a small man with a black suit, matching colored glasses and gray tie opens up a brown leather briefcase and places ledger on the table before him.

''Shall we begin Mr Smith'' he smiles.

Will Neill 2014

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Author's Note

This is going to be my last story post for a while, I'm off to finish my book (look out for it soon) This is just a bit of fun, a story with a twist. Enjoy, and I am sure you will find the errors-you always do. This one will make you think.
Take Care
Will

Reviews

[richieb]

Good story Will, I enjoyed it. It does make you think, and appreciate we have a better way to deal with our fate. Your creativity had a nice blend of humor and and sober truth. I liked your characters, they carried the story well. Reminded me of "The postman always rings twice".
Good luck with your book, hope it does well.
Richie b.

[Will Neill]

Thanks Richie for taking the time to comment.
Will

[Terpsichore]

Very appropriate title and a nicely written tale. We are all finally called to account.

T

[Will Neill]

T thank you for taking the time to read,enjoy and comment on my story. I hope your books balance.read moreT thank you for taking the time to read,enjoy and comment on my story. I hope your books balance.
Will

[Beccy]

I was very much entertained. Poor old Mr Smith, if only he knew what he was in for.

[Will Neill]

Ha! Of course...

[Beccy]

I really enjoyed this, though I confess I sort of knew where it was going pretty much straight off, (I'm a fan of Freud,) but the story was well structured and kept my attention to the end.

Beccy.

[Will Neill]

Beccy, If you were entertained then I succeeded.
Take Care.
Will

[Woody]

your description and narration are always spot on, Will. and the twist, of course, is a damn good bonus.
the story sure gives food for thought. yes before leaving the diner one has to make sure their book is balanced.
shall we begin, Mr. Neill?

[Will Neill]

Engluva, once again thank you for reading and your kind review. I am so glad you enjoyed reading.read moreEngluva, once again thank you for reading and your kind review. I am so glad you enjoyed reading.
Now, make sure your books are balanced.
Take care.
Will

[Marie]

Yes there were some punctuation errors; nothing terrible. I don't usually like long stories, but I followed this one with interest. It's really quite good.

[Will Neill]

Thanks Marie, Make sure your books are balanced.Ha!
Will

[Marie]

I really hope everything balances our in my life, but I can't be sure unti the accountant gets here...