Guilty for being Happy

Why do I feel guilty when I get a bit happy? Don't I deserve it? Am I the one making myself miserable? I...

Tonight I went to a bar
Black walls
But
Golden lamps

I was there with someone
Maybe even a few
People
Who knows

The lights would change the colours
From green to red
To blue to pink
Blinding me

A happy bunch of youth
Drinking their coke
And wine
Sitting in the dark

Nobody knows my name here
A thousand faces swim around
In the sea of
Music and cigarette smoke

I feel so guilty being here
How'd I get to be
A part of them
I gulp

I look at them and him and them
And he looks at me and them and me
Being watched makes me high
But I don't wanna do drugs

I don't feel like
Deceiving people any longer
So I take my jacket
And go home sober

Reviews

[FJ Davis]

A decidedly novel perspective.
Maybe ya just gotta learn how to enjoy the blues.
An entertaining write!

[Yahallo]

Haha, I am trying to [learn]. :D

Thank you a lot!

[Simba]

It’s good to be happy sometimes...life would be so dull if it wasn’t full of ups and downs but you gotta let yourself feel emotions even if you feel guilty sometimes a bit of happiness goes a long way

[Yahallo]

Yeah, I agree, Simba! It's a weird phenomenon though, haha.

[Rye]

Oh WOW!!!
Love your last stanza,
you write SO VERY well,
I like this one a lot.

[Yahallo]

Thank you so so much!♡

I'm glad you like it and I'm glad I've found courage to share my personal, intimate feelings with others.

[Rye]

i just love the part of taking your jacket and go home sober, got a little chuckle out of that part.

[Yahallo]

Haha, I'm glad it made you chuckle (laughing is good for...health and everything!). Thankfully, when I wrote that part, it rhymed (a bit) with the previous line.

[Rye]

very clever and enjoyable.