Fast Forward

10/27/13

Fast forward to the days

when I pack up my suitcase.

I bring my dreams with me

as I take flight to his place.

Fast forward to the days

when he waits me with a grin.

I give him my timid smile,

with a kiss, he pulls me in.

Fast forward to the days

when we walk by the sea.

We voice out our hearts,

sweet lines of poetry.

Fast forward to the days

when he loves me and my scars.

I whisper, "I love you, too."

as we sleep beneath the stars.

Fast forward to the days

when he kneels with a ring.

And all throughout our marriage,

I hear the heaven sing.

Oh, love often contradicts

time's most usual pace

'Cause my thoughts always wander

fast forward to the days...

Author's Note

Some noticed that most of my poems depict sadness. So here's a ray of sunshine for you. :)

Reviews

[Douglas White]

Creative writing of all kinds exposes more about the writer than most of us would really care to admit. In your case with sad poems, the hurt and pain are clear. The circumstances that put you there are uniquely your own, and private, but the feelings that are left behind in your words are the things that people connect with. The emotions coming through are what separate "good" from "excellent". The best poems aren't necessarily about rhythm patterns, stanzas, word count, or anything else. The best poems are the ones you -feel-. That is what the great writers present and past are talking about when they are talking about "truthful writing".

This poem, for example, is a positive write - on the surface. But underneath, I can feel a sad wistfulness behind the words, a feeling that the sunshine is a little forced. A good poem about wishful thinking, but I don't think that you were entirely honest with yourself when you wrote it. Take a good long look at it, and I think you'll see what I mean.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the poem, along with pretty much everything else you've sent my way so far. But I honestly think that if you're sad, you should write sad, until you aren't sad anymore. Don't try to write sunshine when it really isn't in you, even if you think you're writing too many sad poems.

Try writing angry poems, though, if you want a change of pace. Those can be a bit fun. (And they often make great lyrics for death metal songs! Just saying...) :^D

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Doug, Doug, Doug... How come you are so good at things like this? You seem to know me more than I know myself!! Hahaha. Lots of insights that you've taught me today. :)

[smurfett]

Very happy and love filled poet. Thanks for s beautiful write...

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Thanks, Smurfett! :)

[Mark Heathcote]

This kind of reminds me Van Morrison it has a soulful voice like his speaking to me which is very cool. Nice poem.

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Van Morrison? I'm sorry but who is he? :) Thanks, Mark. :)

[FlatLineBeauty]

so sweet ^.^ xo winter

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Thanks, Winter! :)

[gombeggar]

like the last stanza the best here, mahself

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

That's my favorite, too. Thanks. :)

[Chandradhish Ghosh]

:) Sweet...love is a beautiful feeling...we all tend to fast forward with a smile on our faces...I know the feeling and I am sure a lot of others here do...I guess we poets understand it a little more deeply then most others and that is the problem. ;)

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Haha. "Poets understand it a little more deeply than most others." I totally agree! Thank you so much! :)

[Leeci]

aww this is a sweet poem. It's good to have dreams and imagine what our future would be like with the one we love. enjoyed reading :)

[Azure Montessa (Blue)]

Yes, I agree. Thank you, Leeci! :)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Something cute, Blue. I love the rhyme scheme and the the word choice.
When you love somebody, you really do daydreaming...fast forward to those days that you and him exchange your vow to each other.
Cool!

[wordwarrior]

This poem is certainly a ray of gorgeous sunshine! Simply very beautiful, wonderful rhyme and soft imagery of love.

[Lifeofbennard]

This is the greatest thing I've read in days.
I love this so much and it has given me a new inspiration
Keep writing (:

[Emerald Seas]

The last stanza is fabulous. A precise conclusion to a well developed vision.