Clarity With Crackers

A true story, no kidding. Crackers, I ask you?

When I look back, I do not fret

or hold an ounce of sad regret,

that something snapped inside my head.

Our short romance was clearly dead

when Jacob's crackers on a plate

defined the down-turn and the state 

of us.

He counted that I'd eaten three

and while I sipped on Brooke Bond tea,

he turned to me and asked me why

I always ate my crackers dry.

I guess it took me by surprise

that disapproval in his eyes

of blue.

It then occurred quite suddenly,

through insight flashes I could see,

he thought he'd found the ideal friend.

Like dough he'd work with, knead and bend

or shape to suit his older ways,

but in that moment through the haze

it clicked.

He didn't like the clothes I wore,

my untamed hair he thought a bore.

the books I read were lightweight dross,

in all he couldn't care a toss.

I saw he liked the outer shell,

the inner me, his kind of hell,

I walked.

Reviews

[DIVYA]

I know it sounds unfeeling but sometimes little things in a partner become grating on the nerves. Perhaps, there are deeper issues involved. I’d walk away too if it didn’t feel right anymore. A very relatable and realistic portrayal of what goes awry in relationships. Appreciated so much, Chris. 💐

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you DIVYA. If those little things grate at the beginning of a relationship you know what could be in store later down the line: ))

[Neville]

the fella must have been an utter twat .. like I've said before .. every now and then, I am ashamed of my own gender .. still, I'm gonna do something increasingly rare these days and gonna stick with it :)

[Chris Shaw]

Thanks Neville, the guy was indeed what you said he was, add a nit picker and controlling with it to the equation. All over cracker biscuits. Now if I had damaged his 501's :) Have a lovely weekend.

Chris

[Neville]

Yeah, that would have been a different cracker altogether :) You too Chris.

Neville

[Gee]

It's funny what turns folk off. I dated a classy bint a few years ago but she dumped me when she caught me wearing her underwear, not because she found it slightly perverse more so that my arse looked better than hers in half cheek cut, lacy drawers.
NO BUTTER....jeez, I'd have had to ponder continuing the relationship. Dry crackers must be like eating feathers, not that I've ever tried.
Hi Christine, his loss :)
Hope you are well ( cooked)

[Chris Shaw]

Thanks Gee. Now that's a sight to behold for sure! Yes, well and truly cooked today and that's before I've put the dinner on. His loss? Well of course lol. Just think he may be writing poems about me, what a thought!

Chris

[barleygirl]

I love this. Your message is so plain & also so tangled up, just like these things happen in real life. I was blessed to know many fine people as lovers, friends, etc. over the years. I’ve often had that “snapping” experience – something that makes me shudder, every next time it happens – and I’ve ended many encounters in an abrupt way, as you describe. I do wonder, at times, how my life would’ve been different, if I’d been able to get thru the annoying day-to-day stuff with another person (I’ve never been in a longterm relationship). But I have no regrets. I love the way your message goes from one simple annoying habit to the massive unleashing of all the ways another person can dismiss you while acting “in love”! This is cleverly expressed! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Chris Shaw]

Hi Margie. I am normally very laid back and can get on well with anyone. But do ya know what, his nitpicking just went overboard and I snapped. All I could think of was, if he's like this now God help me if I move in with him. Lucky escape me thinks. I can't look a packet of Jacob's cream crackers in the eye now without a reminder lol.

fondest

Chris

[Paul Bell]

It's brill how the crackers finally convinced you this relationship was over.
I wonder if that's why food fights started. Though they usually end up in sex.
Maybe the tea leaves. You saw yourself with an axe just as he was going down in one knee.

[Chris Shaw]

No tea leaves in my tea Paul, it was all down to those cracker biscuits lol. Thank you.

read moreNo tea leaves in my tea Paul, it was all down to those cracker biscuits lol. Thank you.

Chris

[Nigel Newman]

Nicely done Chris. I especially like the structure of rhyming rhythm then the two syllable closing lines that respond or link well with the preceding lines. Yes it can be the strangest things, and they often don't emerge until well into a relationship when the two people inevitably start to see each other differently as initial wonder/joy/excitement/exploration etc give way and should ideally evolve into deeper things where each sees the full person. And what i like about this is its slightly humorous edge whilst still saying something interesting. If you read my poem 'I don't like being in love' you will see similar sentiments but done in a much more earnest way.

Nice work!
BRs Nigel

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Nigel, I'll take a look at your poem.

Chris

[Mrudula Rani]

The inner voice comes shouting at the exact time... crackers or no crackers, telling you to get out of that spot at that instant, not to waste another precious moment on something that will be of no worth. A wonderful lesson that will forever follow your snack with a relief, C.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you M. Yes that inner voice certainly came through at that moment. Your review, very much appreciated.

Chris

[Einstein Noodle]

i really like the form Christine .. is that something of your own design? those 2 word punches are very effective ... great rhythm and rhyme .. not everyone can do it well ;) your poem reads very naturally .. i like the scene .. the crackers ... the revelation ... and the humor of it all is just right says i .. i wonder if she will always meet first dates .... with a fine dry cracker plates ;)
E.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you E. The form is one of my own. This is quite an old poem but I found it the other day and decided it was time to give it an airing. So pleased you saw the humour in it.

Chris

[Einstein Noodle]

wow! nice work! i think its top notch and will pack your form in the back of me noodle ..may it find words to go with it one day ... very cool!

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you :))

[Onlyme]

Wow, Chris, this spoke volumes. To be in a relationship and suddenly in the flash of an eye. Realize you were under a spell. And not actually what you thought them to be towards you. But the vail lift and you saw. That sham of reality that it really was. So sorry to hear about this guy. I think to be honest. We have all had a relationship like that.

[Chris Shaw]

Don't be sorry Dee, it was a moment that probably saved me a lot of misery in the times ahead. Thank you for your response.

Chris

[Lyn Anderson]

Sometimes it is a very simple moment that brings us to that epiphany. Counting crackers or hating our hair, at the end of the day, the little things add up to a big thing

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Lyn, yes a simple moment when everything clarifies before your eyes. Like finding the missing piece of a puzzle.

Chris

[.]

I think Divya has said it all about this poem, Christine. I suppose you could put it all down to the old "familiarity breeds contempt" saying. It's tragic, but over time couples do tend to drift apart and annoy each other with just the simplest things.

The sadness of this poem is balanced with the joyous flow of words down the page, and that unique styling of the additional wording on each seventh line. Such a well rhymed and flowing poem! Very well done.

[Chris Shaw]

Thank you Doodley. I hope my words didn't come across too sad, because on reflection I consider I had a lucky escape :)) It was a flash in the pan type of romance.

Chris