What's the point?

Essay

Have you ever looked up into the night sky on a clear evening, in an area that is void of city lights, residential lights, somewhere, say, like the desert or the ocean? The sky is alive with tens of millions of twinkling stars, some so faint that the other star's luminosity make them hard to see. Surely, we all have, and by the scant notion that you have spent your existence without having afforded yourself that opportunity to gaze in to past, to view the lights that have taken millions of years to reach your eyes, quit wasting time and take a look. If you are the kind that is just scared to death of the dark and such a venture couldn't be accomplished without first taking a Valium, then your 2nd best option is to check out the pictures posted on the Hubble Space telescope website, which IMO everyone should do anyway. While there you can see back BILLIONS of years and view the countless celestial bodies through the universe. It could easily be argued that these are the greatest of times simply due to our ability to view that which has never been seen by man in the history of human existence. Now that I have your mind on this imaginary page of thought, are you feeling pretty small within the scope of this vast horizon? It never fails me to feel as such. I'm 5'10" and 350 lbs. but suddenly feel the size of a pin point on a football field. Although I'm always amazed, I dare not linger long in the wonderment for I find it to be quite crushing to my evidently fragile psyche. Suddenly, each time, I return to the heartbreaking, mind bending thought which is, "What's the point"? How can I continue on with my egomaniacal train of existence having just realized the diminutive reality of what I amount to in the vast expanse of time and space? Really, how important is anything I do? What effect will all of my greatest accomplishments, realized, by chance, through my maximum efforts, and possibly applauded by all or none, ultimately effect in any way whatsoever the incomprehensible scheme of the greater picture that surrounds us all? Does it matter that I have morals and virtues, few as they may be? Do the words I say or the cries I emit ever travel beyond that barrier we call our own atmosphere? And would they travel through time and space, are there ears that might hear them, much the less understand them? This knowledge of living in such a microcosm, effecting only that which is around us, on this pebble of a rock we call Earth, in the ocean of a universe without end is somehow a dead end at the street of "Meaningless Ave." Yes, it would be as such if it were not for the "point". The reason for my writing is to unveil the point, that being "faith". Without faith, there is no other point worth mentioning. I'm not bold enough to attempt to define "what" that faith is or should be, but I do believe it must exist in order for us to exist. I believe we all have many faiths, some bigger and more important than others, and we set in an order of priority in our lives. It's how we get through the day, minute by minute, hour by hour. Faith that I will continue to write this blog till I decide I'm finished, faith that someone will read it, and faith that maybe it might be the reason for pause and reflection for whatever reason that might be. It's the faith of knowing that there "has" to be a purpose, yet realizing all the while that most likely I'll never truly know that purpose, and in the end, need not. I do believe, through faith, that were it not for my own "pin point on this football field", the football field, for whatever it's composition and purpose, would cease to exist, because were it not for my one microscopic point of existence there would lie instead a black hole which would then grow to engulf the entire football field at some point in time. That being written, I suppose the second point is that I'm pretty important.

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