amidol

her bedroom is a port in storms
colonized by sentimental sketches and ideas.
Nostalgia trapped in Amidol.

each night
 is a drop of water
 down an unexpected drain

through course tunnels accompanied by other nights

traveling to a consequential

resting place.

Reviews

[Butch Decatoria]

Nice one, precise and sweet, imagery is movement through your words... Like the progress of rain down walls of some house...

[julian3]

Long ago, when I would sometimes play my shakuhachi on late, insomniac nights -my wife sleeping in the next room, the dogs and cats resting quietly - on occasion the bamboo would find a very mellow, yet slightly melancholy note, which I would sustain for a few moments. This piece reminds me of that - a yellowish low wattage bulb casting a faint light across a room, the distant hum of a fan and a haunting bamboo note - these words fit that moment so very well.

[Kat Williams]

I like this..sorta agreeing with the others very melancholy for some odd reason...thinking the sparseness of the words..

[Nicholas Hallows]

This is by far my favourite of your poems.
I agree with the other two reviews about a sense of melancholic nostalgia. It also does have a calm feeling like a port in a storm.
Very well done!

[Barbara Walker]

A tone of melancholy sadness, which addresses the subject very well. Good flow and metaphor! Nice write! Barbara

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Personally, I loved this, I thought it was freaking awesome. I find such a nostalgic, smoky feel to the sensualty of the piece. Just brilliant!

[Annalisa]

This was interesting tough I gatta admit that when you moved the last half of the line inward it was a bit distracting. You did it just enough for me to notice it, but not be sure and I was paying more attention to that, and wondering if it was intentional or not, than to the actually poem. When i went back and read it again I really liked the poem itself but the formatting is confusing. I would suggest either not moving the lines inward, or exaggerating the movement a little more so that it looks intentional.