Alcatraz of the Mind

Alcatraz of the Mind

 

 

 

incarcerated emotions

white haired jailbird

writes the same thing day after day

with his chalked will

on a wall of consumed memory

 

the sentence starts getting more punctuation

too many stops and restarts

the pauses, longer

the intention to finish the paragraph

loses momentum,

 

years fade into years

the warden paces,

 

just waiting.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

11/21/15

Reviews

[Gaia Octavia]

I really enjoyed this. My favorite thing about poetry is how one poem can mean so many different things to so many different people. Or even different things to just one person, including the writer themselves. This piece has so much potential to do just that. At first read I related to this in that I have recently felt trapped in the same constant theme in my writing. On second read, I related to it in the way that I feel when I am stuck and unable to write at all. And finally, I focused on the idea of the pacing warden more so than the "white haired jailbird" which gave the entire piece a whole new level of meaning. And still, after all of this, I feel it is quite possible that I have missed the original intent of its author. Well done!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i don't think readers ever miss...if they relate in some way to a poem, then the poem has success. And i really enjoyed your take...thank you, Gaia.

j.

[Gaia Octavia]

Fair enough. I'd have to agree with your statement as well ☺

[m.s.early]

I was just listening to an article on NPR about a prisoner being executed but the lethal injection did not take effect and now he has more time to prove his innocence.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your comment, x.

j.

[SquinklaPsyOps]

Hi

The poem could be about a convicted jailbird entity that is stuck on earth and has nothing to look forward to as time in the world has stood still as is pulled by the warden of gravity that disallows him to fly away from earth and free to heaven.

Or it could be about a writer that is searching to find what subjects are easy to write about.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words...could be, yes, could be...i like both interpretations immensely ....

j.

[rubie]

outstanding use of metaphor....

i can relate to this one. sometimes, i feel as if i have a life sentence, with my heart and emotions hopelessly imprisoned, so much so that even if i were granted parole, i would have to learn how to function in society all over again, because society has changed so much since I was last free....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, and sharing how you related to this...

j.

[rutherford]

Prison is a powerful metaphor and works with emotions. Effectively gives the feeling of how indefinite some hard feelings may last. They say time heals all wounds but one never knows how long that sentence will be. As always, I like the spare powerful style of your poems

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for the kind words, rutherford...

j.

[Sami Khalil]

A famous jail or a fortress type prison for the hardened ones with low chance of escape. An imprisoned lover with hardened emotions with no chance of escape of the past or turn back the clock. An excellent write, Jacob...:)...........

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you amaze me with your constant astute insights...
thank you, Sami.

j.

[Sami Khalil]

Wow. You are welcome muchly. .....:)......

[Terpsichore]

I think the walls we sometimes build around us are far harder to escape from than Alcatraz ever was.

Brilliant poetry. T

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words and insight, T.

j.

[Jimmy Yetts]

Yeah, some "jailbirds" I know have truly been doing hard time--almost no chance of parole.
(Not you and I, of course.)
Somebody's gotta crash these lifers out!
Your message, smartly and creatively delivered!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Jimmy...

j.

[Ayushi Jha]

Wowww! It strikes the emotions, quite deep. Great work!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Ayushi...

j.

[boblakin]

Even if the key gets turned in the lock, we don't always walk free.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

so true, thank you, boblakin...

j.