a flower's truth

a flower's truth

enamored with roses

and your fake poses

I drew your silhouette

in the sand

propositioning

you would take my hand

but as roses bloom

then fade

you closed your bulb

the light shut out

my garden dark and trippy

thorns, wounds made

the bleeding found its route

a poem born 

from granules drawn

then scattered

a heart, too many lines long

with nowhere to land.

erin-cilberto

5/8/24

Reviews

[poetgurl (Plainly Meg)]

Those thorns can and will teach one a lesson, This is wonderful

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for the kind words, Meg,
j.

[DIVYA]

One has to be so careful with roses. They come with thorns, after all. They can be deceptive too and not as welcoming as they seem. The heart is so let down. The dissapointment is so palpable. Loved the emotions spilling here....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate your insights, Divya...you often seem to find more in my words than is probably there.
j.

[Perdition]

Well, one major thing I believe most poets do in their poetry is let the projections out...if done well the capturing reads light and cat-skilled, or you're left with a feeling you've just been somewhere very, very familiar, or almost a religious experience, and in this one, you've done most so now all I can do is wonder over whether this is a rendering grin towards time, life, love, self, or the granules of what the clock ticks away and what we feel is wasted slips between. I hope your silhouette was a grand reflection of a life like the rose which looking back has found a worthy beach. Enjoyed this J..thanks~

[jacob erin-cilberto]

This review is way better than the poem....thank you, Perdition...
j.

[nadia dmitri]

"the bleeding found its route
a poem born"

Love love love love love this.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, nadia,
j.

[emmajoygreen]

Brief in your own way: an analogy that takes this situation for what it is, was.. a sadness that still lingers only to come and go.. then fades into a memory - as nature does, can, will. Painful.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I note your new avatar...cool.

thank you for your words, em.
j.

[Patricia]

beauty, it's what first attracts us, beauty is not always truth, it can make fools of us, sadly, painfully, regretfully. this is a relatable and touching write, love it

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Patricia, nice to see you around again.
j.

[mou]

'...I drew your silhouette
in the sand

propositioning
you would take my hand...'

I love how a flower's truth is described with the touch of reality. Beautiful poem, J
- mou

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, mou,
j.

[Desert Knave]

I like this. I have a tendency to fall first, and have had too many "bulbs" close. ~Jim

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Jim....appreciate you sharing how you relate,
j.

[Dave]

It's funny how love can fool us. The beauty of it so takes us, but often we forget the accompanying
thorns. As beautiful as the rose is, there are always the thorns to be aware of. I appreciate the
sentiment here.
Take care - Dave

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I am still bleeding...thanks for the tourniquet Dave.
j.

[Dave]

You're more than welcome. A tourniquet, that bad?! A simple bandaid wouldn't do?
By the way, I posted two short sto

[Dave]

stories you might like

[Chris Shaw]

Wow, this poem doesn’t disguise at all the disappointment of a heart felt let down. The thorns made their mark, the wound opens and you bleed a poem. It is felt deeply j.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Chris,
j.