My Red Love

My way of sharing with the world the most heart stopping moment of my life.

The sheer force had knocked me,

Heaving and sweat on the head,

Heightened senses so vampire-like,

And the frightening streets ahead,

Not deserving to pray,

I felt too lost to say,

The thumping head,

And the heart struggling to beat,

Not giving up,

Toughening up,

No time to cry or to weep,

Seeing pain through the beads,

Nobody spoke,

It was over.

No room for trauma.

I took the chance to clear my eyes,

And thanked heaven for my daughter’s cries.

 

 

 

Author's Note

I tried not to be to graphic for those weak hearted

Reviews

[-Scribe in Style-]

Its beautiful.. Well described.. :) I loved the read.

[Josie E. Cook M. A.]

Smooth structure with fast moving action. The ending sums up the relief, and the event referenced in the poem.
I would love to see this with some added graphic detail, too. However, you did achieve your point well in a short space here.

[MichaelsLyric.com]

A unique view at the experience of giving birth. This piece feels very thriller-like. The structure is smooth, with subtle but supportive rhyme. Greatly enjoyed it. Thank you for writing.

[ZeniaK]

Wow. This was so heartfelt and raw, and I can't believe this happened to you. A great write.

[Tumara Hall]

Awww thankyou. My wee baby was a bit early, so it was all a bit of a surprise! It was nice to voice how I felt. Thankyou so much for stopping by~

[Sami Khalil]

I felt too lost to say,

The thumping head,

And the heart struggling to beat,

Not giving up,

Toughening up,

No time to cry or to weep,

[Praveeta]

Well crafted poem displaying your heartfelt experience. Thanks for sharing.

[Tumara Hall]

Thank you so much for stopping by.

[Praveeta]

You are welcome.

[Scott Metro]

...and the beat goes on. You fulfilled the meaning of life.
A good read..
Well done.

Scott

[bobc]

TH...not many weak-hearted here, I think. Nice poem...I liked the way rhyme was used in service of the flow in the piece. As a result, it didn't feel contrived to my ear. Well done...one very small thing...'I felt to lost to say'. Didn't you mean 'I felt too lost to say'? Thanx...bobc

[Tumara Hall]

Thankyou so much! I have a terrible tendency to overlook such errors! :) I am glad there are not many weak hearted here!! Thankyou for your wonderful comments!

[Sami Khalil]

A splendid read and write...Thank you for penning...:).................

[Grayciey]

Aww!! Soo passionate! The pain and joy of being a mother!! Love it! :-)