A Day that Started and Ended with Tears

Talking in the corridor,

We almost broke it all.

Our heartbeats heard for miles,

as we never spoke a word.

Our friends gaze at us with curiosity,

some had worn teasing smiles.

But we still have not spoken a word. 

Our minds still thinking over what we should do.

I didn't want to keep it this way.

So I spoke, quiet as I could.

As I didn't want our friends to hear,

I didn't want to scream,

I didn't want to cry.

Doesn't matter how much we don't want to,

I spoke clearly, yet my voice broke

Tears rolled down my face as I tried to convince you to stay,

only stopping when our friends walked past us.

You still haven't spoken.

Gears were still turning in your head,

wondering if I was still even worth it

Time passed and even teachers passed us by. 

Then you spoke, 

saying you never forgot every bad thing I did

saying you kept it all bottled up

for when you've had enough,

you'd end things. 

That's why you're doing this

My heart hurt as I listened. 

But I couldn't say anything back

I didn't have the right to

I already knew I'm incapable of loving,

but hearing it from the person I love.

Just broke me.

Tears fell but I still haven't replied

I kept my head down, 

wiping my tears with my jacket. 

Putting the hood up so to hide my face,

as I felt too ashamed of myself.

You stopped talking, 

and I was conflicted. 

I had wanted to continue hearing your voice,

yet your voice was so cold I didn't want to listen.

I had heard the hatred you had for me

The hurt and the anger

I didn't feel love.

I already knew.

You no longer love me

The way that I do.

I was too late

Minutes went and I spoke,

I apologized. 

I spoke the truth.

I opened up.

I kept repeating that while I did a lot of idiotic things in the past,

I had promised you a few months ago that I'd make up for it. 

I never spoke a lie.

as I said I only wanted to be with you. 

You only listened, 

as my voice broke,

as tears fell. 

You listened. 

But you so clearly didn't believe me.

Then you held my arm and said. 

'Stop crying,

I'm sorry. 

We're okay.'

I never replied. 

I looked at you, tears continue to fall. 

You told me to go up to my class

but I shook my head.

I told you to go to your class and I'd leave soonafter.

You looked at me for a while

Then stood up and left. 

The day went by so quickly,

I would randomly tear up

Then shake my head so to stop it from falling.

I would think of you and I'd want to tell my friends,

but I didn't want to talk about it either. 

I'm tired of being a problem to them.

I didn't want them to know

But I still would cry.

For my day hasn't gone as well as I hoped it would

It's nightfall.

I sent you a long message.

You replied, cold as ice.

I tried to make our conversation happy,

but nevermind.

You may say you love me. 

But your hate trumps your love

I don't blame you.

You had already thought once,

that you don't want to be with me anymore.

I don't have the right to be sad about you being cold.

You sent a message that you'd sleep

But you and I both know you aren't going to

You just don't want to talk to me anymore

Even if I point it out, you'd deny it.

So I went with your lie

Telling you to sleep well as my eyes burned

Hoping to talk to you tomorrow as I breathe heavily

Reading your reply as tears once again fell. 

'Night,' you said. 

I'm sorry I'm the kind of person you chose.

But I still love you so much