fading away

fading away

A Poem by Jazmyne

Its cold where I am
Its too dark to see
Its scary and lonely
But its where I'm meant to be
Its cold where I am
I feel I cant breathe
Its pulling me further and further
Im falling in so deep

The world is dark and black
My family seems dead
Its like they have no soul
these nasty thoughts in my head
I've never felt this way before
My pain has been taken to the world to see
Theyre all laughing
Can't they see they're killing me?

They're crushing me day by day
I feel like I can't breathe
I'm screaming and yelling for help
But no one is there to help me
My body, heart, and soul are gone
I just want this pain to go away
I want to go to sleep
I want to die today

I want them to know
I want them to see
I want them to feel
What its like to be me

© 2008 Jazmyne


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Reviews

very visual. this is awsome, to say the least.
you express what you were saying really really well.
Nice job, really heartbreaking but exceptionaly beautiful.

Sj

Posted 15 Years Ago


Nice, very nice work.....
Well done.

Posted 16 Years Ago


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WoW! Deeply emotional, and very heartbreaking. Excellent way with your words here. I can feel them so much. I feel like this most of the time, actually. Well done, this piece :) *Hugs*

Mikey

Posted 16 Years Ago


You have a way of pouring your emotions into your writing which is what you are supposed to do, but when you can make the reader feel what you feel,than that is a very powerful gift that you have! :) That's just my humble opinion! :) Great job yet again sweetie! I luv your work! Can't wait to read more! One luv gurl!

-JC-

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

it's like im reading something I wrote. Good Job. Wording, mood, emotion, :::::sniff sniff:::: A girl after my own heart!

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow... another powerful poem here Jaz... The pain is very easy to feel and understand the way you wrote this one... Might I suggest you use those last 4 lines in a chorus and maybe turn this one into a song... I can really hear Amy Lee belting those words out... fantastic job...

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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155 Views
6 Reviews
Rating
Added on February 20, 2008
Last Updated on March 5, 2008

Author

Jazmyne
Jazmyne

you may have broke my heart, but ill be the one that haunts your dreamz!, AZ



About
i am very stuborn and never liked pple telling me what to do. expecially what to write. i loved my english classes but didnt get along with the teachers cause the way i wrote wasnt what they wanted. m.. more..

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