Steel is Yielding

I've come a long way.

But I still feel like I'm not enough.

And now, as I stumble into the darkness, I feel a part of me is still hoping to remain steadfast. The truth is, I don't want to fall. No matter how many times I've convinced myself that I'd crumble, I've never been more sure than I am now that I've hit rock bottom. A little push, and I'm off to the very brink...

I knew it would come to this. Deep down, I knew somehow, someday I'd come to ruin... But it doesn't hurt. Perhaps the hopelessness has dulled the feeling. Maybe the feeling of how glorious this is...

I feel like a soldier standing as the last line of defense before the enemy takes over. All my comrades are dead save for me. I managed to repel a wave of them, but at the price of two fatal wounds with nothing to keep myself from bleeding out. I lie in wait for the next wave as I clutch myself to reroute the pain in my wounds. The waiting is insufferable as I reload my rifle. The smell of smoke and guts fills the air as I take position... And from where I'm stationed, I see them all. Claws and fangs bared. Eyes burning red. Overzealous as they sight the fort defended by only one man standing. The lead poisoning makes my blood itch. My heart sinks as they rush the fort, armed to the teeth, hungry for conquest... But with this feeling, this unbearable pain, I feel the smoldering remains of the embers in my heart have turned into a roaring flame.

The odds are against me. I know it's impossible. I know this isn't going to end well for me. Once they make it to the fort, it's all over. But here I stand. Unafraid of their tenacity. Unfazed by their rage. I refuse to run. I refuse to waver. They're not killing me, but I will kill every last one of them as long as there's breath in me... And if I die, I'll die with my hands on the enemy's throat.

My story makes no meaning in this world. It holds no significance. Millions more make the same sacrifice as I. Even if no one knows, even if no one cares, I refuse to fall here.

This is where I make my stand. This is where I hold the line. And I swear, as long as there's life in me, I will not fall.