Collision Course

There is no pride in this

I know your name

The street sign of your marrow

Your bone

Three flights of stairs to your grasp

I�'m tangled by passing strangers 

Faces carved into marionettes 

Dancing 

The gardener is there spying me

Tending to his petunias like living diamonds 

I stand

A wooden decoy 

Frozen 

Three flights of stairs to your passion

She calls to me 

A dangerous angel with curving hips 

Perhaps this is the one

To align the planets of this heart

My greed for love

Pulling my jacket tight

Hand lifted to the street

The taxi arrives 

Swept in, a mad conquering hero 

Home please

Reviews

[Emily]

I love the meaning!!
Keep it up!!

[Neal S]

Thank you!! :)

[D Connolly]

There are so many great lines in this poem, and I love that your hero is torn between something he thinks he "should" have and the idea that maybe he just isn't ready. The pressure to be in love is so overwhelming and pervasive, I mean, it's kind of creepy the way we've convinced ourselves that we need another person to be complete. I'm glad that he had the courage to leave and follow his heart

[Neal S]

I'm glad you enjoyed it! Thanks so much for the review.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

sometimes the need takes over and we forget sense---those flights of stairs can be mighty dangerous...
you reminded me of our apartment in the Bronx...5 flights up, no elevator...quite the long haul of steps...that was home...this is another kind of home...that temporary one of feeling good...at least for the moment.

j.

[Neal S]

Thank you Jacob. I'm glad I could bring back some memories for you even if it was a long haul lol..Thanks again Sir for the review!

[Kathy Van Kurin]

Neal S.
I think the mad race to be in relationship is something dangerous. Gradual is a safer speed for the specific position of being at one with another and learning about one another. The end speaks to a soul realizing the heart is not ready and that the direction may not be safe either. Excellent expression of possibilities. Bless you much. kathy

[Neal S]

Thank you so much for the review and you're oh so right!

[Lorry]

When we first learn of love, we wonder what that must feel like. When we first feel love, we wonder how we ever lived without it. When we are in the maze of love, no one tells us that the maze is overcrowded with people seemingly going against the grain of our direction, leaving us to feel like that salmon, fighting the stream to reach our goal, no matter what it takes, leaving us at the point of exhaustion every time we think we have an answer, only to find that it is only another turn in the road and there is farther to go than we imagined. Love the bittersweet ending, where we retreat to regroup and fight the good fight another day :)

[Neal S]

Indeed my friend! Thank you so much for the review!

[Lorry]

Most welcome :)

[Valentine]

For me this left me questioning, was she waiting up those 3 stories at your home or was this someone to scared to climb the flight of stairs to someone he didn't know if he was up to the task with. Just wondering. Valentine

[Neal S]

He was standing outside her home knowing she was there but not being confident enough to go inside.

[Valentine]

Gotcha,,,Kathie

[FIN]

Once again, love the language of your work "the street sign of your marrow" "tending to his petunias like living diamonds"

Beautiful imagery, from start to finish, as always seems to be the case with you. You paint vivid pictures and you paint them well.

Question: Did you evade this dangerous, curvaceous angel; or was this the after math of the encounter, with her?

It seems there are a few signs which could evoke this story in either manner.

Aftermath:
"There is no pride in this."
"She calls to me."
"Perhaps this is the one."
"My greed for love."
"Pulling my jacket tight."

Or

Saved from:
"I'm tangled by passing strangers."
"I stand."
"A wooden decoy."
"Frozen."
"Swept in, a mad conquering hero."

All I need to know is if, "Swept in, a mad conquering hero." Is an ego trip then I know you went up those damn "Three flights of stairs." Which also perturbed me about your conquest within this beautifully lain out scenery.

Super fun read.

[Neal S]

No. I pictured a man standing in front of a building. Knowing it could be the person for him inside but also knowing she was dangerous in her own way. Love is a dangerous thing within itself. He was unsure of himself. He lacked confidence in himself. Which I guess we all do at time. So he had to move on.

[FIN]

Ah, I see. My twisted mind turned this lovely poem into something utterly different. Funny how that can happen, just speaking of subjectivity too, with you. (:

[Neal S]

No kidding lol...But it is what it is to every person. And your view of this work wasn't different its just what it needed to be.

[FIN]

I loved it nonetheless. Both aspects I created outside your intended purpose; and your actual desired intention. But yours chokes me up for the lack of confidence in this man. Grabs my heart and twist and turns it. Very emotional piece. Much better than my initial perceptions of the work.

[Neal S]

Well thank ya Sir!