Life did that or you ??

you are talking there
and im here alone
looking at myself in the miror
and writing what is on my mind
you can talk there
but you cant me here
im crying,dying
you never cared
but why now you are trying
to make it better
why you are tryig to help me now ?
after what ?
after you pulled me to the death way
after you injured me my biggest injure
after you throw me in a war that i wasnt ready for
ater you make me a meal for your lions
after what?
i loved you baby
i wanted you to be always mine
i wanted to make you my shadow
but you said no !!
and now im trying to move on
and i will never come back again
to your heart or to your love
but finally
life means to me the ending of love

Reviews

[Cherry Lai^_^♥~~]

Marvellous...

[Yina]

WOW! That's how I feel about someone to!:(

[Akshat♥]

that means life has better person for you..
you are lucky..poem is awesome..
i think you are angry..when you have written it..
its sad..its better to move on:)

[.......]

such a emotional write, I can feel the longing. Well expressed emotions

[Enigma]

Your poem talks of love, hurt, longing and reason - all in one. A love that hurts is best left behind so as to free ourselves to take a step forward. Great write! :)

[SoulCrusader (Yas)]

Suhad, another great poem, your look on love is so spot on. Love it:)

[Jeremy Baker]

Is English your first language? Either way, this is an amazing poem! Especially for one as young as yourself. Very deep and introspective. Thank you for sharing this!

[EMF]

I love this stream of consciousness work. It has an immediacy and intimacy. Other people may say check for upper case usage, but please don't. This is perfect as is from the gushing to the raw emotion. Just one little criticism. The exclamation mark. So many people overuse them them they leap out. Try it with a full stop instead. It might make it flow even sharper. But that's just one opinion.
Another proper job.