Lost Steps

====Lost Steps====

copyright@pushkar prabhat, 31-03-15

 

Lost in;

Fog of opinions,

          With compromised vision,

          And disrupted breathing.......

 

Here nowhere,

On the edge of this line:

          An imaginary boundary,

          Between imaginations.

 

i have to maintain a stand,

Against this crosswind

        Of conscience and morals

 

i have to walk along....

          straight and strong.

 

i feel sand

Beneath my feet.

It is here,

i want to belong.

 

Across is not unknown

Unfair it is wet cement,

An inch a step apart

Forever to lament......

 

Unfair this side

Washed by waves,

No step however strong,

 Stays for long......

 

i stumble, fumble....

But keep on....

 

And when the sun rises,

Shinning judgements all over....

Looking back all you see.....

Are some erroneous steps

Frozen in time.....

Reviews

[Ashwin Thakur]

Light when concentrated becomes a single ray of light which burns everything
That same light when letted free on a sunny rainy day creates a beautiful rainbow
Its the same light but why they have two personas
Its your light in the path of your destiny
You decide if you have to burn down your path to destiny or spread rainbows
Surely great poem brother i didnt expected any thing less from you:):):)

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW!!! beautiful review.............thank you so so much for your generous words.........really appreciate it!!! :) :)

[Penny]

Regret.. Thats the first feeling I can extract from this piece, but that's my personal opinion. And yes, because you've written such a profound piece, with such beautiful words I hope others find some other meaning hidden in it. Great poetry..

[Miyank]

Using artistic methods to present a wonderful poem, a round of applause.

[Pushkar Prabhat]

Thanks a lot...............really appreciate your kind words......... *bows*!!! :) :)

[Anahat]

Wow!
From title to the last word I loved every word of it!
Yes indeed this is Epic as fellow writers commented.
Well done. Kudos!

-Anahat :)

[Pushkar Prabhat]

Thank you so very much............i really appreciate you saying that..........!!! :) :)

[Anahat]

Pleasure's all mine friend! :)

[Tom McRoberts]

Another really solid piece here, man. I really appreciate how you conveyed the narrative of the poem through the look of it on the page as well as through the words themselves. Including the word 'fog' early on is a really nice touch, leaves the reader no doubt you know what you're doing!

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW!!! thank you so much..............means a lot to me!!! :) :)

[Prashant Pandey]

U r a great writer man. This is epic.

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW!!!..........great honor.....thank you so much........!!! :) :)

[Ruth]

Blooming epic! Maintaining one's own perception/perspective is a hard path to walk with conviction, at times...awesome write!

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW!!! thank you so so much..............you are so kind.......!!!! :) :)

[SleeplessVolcano]

mmmmm.....marvelous images.....as we stumble, fumble....but we do not give up, but persevere.... looking back, to see our mistakes frozen in time, may very well mean that we see them and remember them, but I find hope in the fact that they are frozen - i.e. not able to grab us anymore as they might have done in the past.......inspired writing!! :)

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW!!!!yes there is hope because they are frozen........we do not repeat them......still people judge us by them, which is the irony......thank you so much for this great and generous review!!!! so glad it could inspire.......!!! :) :)

[Shubham Joshi]

I feel sorry for myself, I am no poet, I just don't know how the hell do you people write poems...
Poems just go above my head and yet you write words so confusing and yet so revealing and so enchanting......

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW...............don't feel sorry bhai.......i am the least poetic here............hope you are alright.......i could be confusing sometimes.........!!! thank you for this honest and unique review!!! :) :)

[JayceeC]

Great use of form in the first three strophes. It mirrors the taking of those uncertain steps. I like that it straightens with the strength of morals and then step as you stumble upon temtation.

The occasional rhyme scheme also enforces the thought of stumbling and is employed in such a way that it never feels forced...like you used the word because it rhymes rather than poetic content.
Excellent job with the details a d imagery which save this from being another moral dellema poem and tranforms into a great piece of originality.

[Pushkar Prabhat]

WoW!!!! this made my day.........thank you for such generous and passionate response.........thank you so much........really means a lot!!! :) :)

[JayceeC]

You're welcome..I call it like I see it always!

[Pushkar Prabhat]

That even more awesome..........i do that too........!!!! Thank you!!! :) :)