Killing My Personal Monster

What if you could finally get rid of your childhood monster once and for all?

    I choose to go back to my eight year old self's time.
    Why?
    Because I want to find that goddamn monster that was in my closet.

 
   2003


      I sit in my younger self's room. It sickens me. I remember those pink curtains. Pink cotton bedsheets. Tickle me pink clothes. It's like a pig ate cotton candy then threw up all over this room. It was my mother's taste, of course. I wanted to have a rainbow room.
      "MOM! I'm home!" It was my voice. Before puberty. High pitched and very, very, annoying. Then I heard footsteps coming up the stairs. S**t.
      I look around for a hiding place. My eyes zero in on the closet. I quickly tumble in there, pushing past the crap blocking part of the door. I close the door behind me, and crawl back up against the wall. I wonder vaguely if I'm about to enter Narnia. I feel behind me. Nope. All wall. Oh, well.
      Since it looks like I'm going to be here for a while, I decide to explore my childhood shoved into a closet. I take my mini pocket flashlight(for blackouts. I'm paranoid.) and turn it on. It lights up my hidden interests. Crap I couldn't let my mom see. I rummage through a box and pull out a CD. System of a A Down? Eight year old me listened to Nu Metal?! Oh, that's right. My older brother gave it to me after he saw mom give me a Kelly Clarkson CD. What a good brother.
      Exploring deeper, I find a Nightmare Before Christmas diary. On the inside, I see the name Jake Hufferman and a heart around it. I snort laughter. Hufferman? I remember having a crush on him. Now he's a straight F failure. Good thing I got over him after he told me my teeth were to big. I dig deeper, and I find a 1st grade picture of me. Wild hair in a frenzy and mismatched shirt/jacket combo. My dad tried to dress me.
       I also find smashed My Little Pony dolls. Good girl, I think about myself. Dolls without legs. A fancy blouse, cut in pieces. It was like an Eight Year Old Rebellion in here. Outside, I hear me telling my mom I'm going to bed. Odd. I never went to bed without a fight. I check my watch. 9:08. It's probably dark outside. Which reminds me...
       My original mission for traveling back in time using my super smart brother's new time machine(which I got to be the first to test out.) The monster in my closet. I hear a low chuckle from behind me. I slowly turned around, fully expecting the mighty beast.
       It looked like Freddy and the Boogeyman had a child, and that child had sex with a drug addict w***e, and that spawn was in my eight year old self's closet. He puts a ragged, bloody finger to his cracked deformed lips. I smother a scream. I hear a whisper from outside the closet. I turn off my flashlight so I won't have to see the beast.
      "Now to find that monster..." It was me. And I'm coming towards me. My stupid, brave eight-year-old self is coming towards the monster. I cross my fingers and hope shedoesn't open that door. No such luck. The closet door creaks open, a flashlight's bright light flooding the closet.
       "Hello?" She/ I say.
       "Get out of here!" I yell to myself, and pick up a nearby book. I chuck it at the monster's head. My eight year old self screams bloody murder once she sees the monster. I quickly back out of the closet, pushing her behind me. If she dies, than I die. If I die, then my brother will never send me back in time once she grows up.
        "Do you have any possible weapons?" I ask her.
        "Under the bed, "she says. I remember. The hammer, in case of thieves. While the monster recovers from the book, I scurry under the bed, myself behind me, and grab the hammer. I grip it tight, and hold it like a mallet. Everything's silent for a moment. She breathes fast and heavily behind me. Sweat drips down my forehead. Then a burst of raw howls and roars. the monster bursts out of the closet, making one athletic lunge towards me. Other Me and I shriek.
        I quickly bring down the hammer on his butt ugly head. He falls to the ground. Twitching. I heave the hammer up over my head.
        "Game's over, m**********r," I say casually, and crash it down, putting all of my weight into the swing. His head bursts into green and red liquid goo, which splatters all of the pink. It looks pretty good. I breathe heavily. She whimpers behind me. The door to the hallway swings open, my frantic mother wide eyed.
         "Holy s**t," she says, seeing the mess.
        I start to fade, and I know I'm leaving. 
         I look up at my mom, a s**t eating grin on my face.
        "Bye, mommy."
       

Author's Note

I went mostly for comedy here, people.

Reviews

[roarke]

lol. You aren't related to "Hit Girl" by any chance are you?
This is a great story and great concept and extremely well written for your age. MANY KUDOS.
The meeting scene, closet and monster need a little clarification.
Don't discard this story. It could turn into a great YA series, like Lemony Snicket or Artemis Fowl.
All this story needs is some more re-writing drafts, a word here, a short sentence there. Nothing much at all really.
You've got a great writing future, keep following it and doing the hard work. Again, very impressive for 13. My what 5 years difference makes huh. lol
I enjoyed the read and am an instant fan. Can I have an autographed edition of your first book?

[Taylor H.]

I thought it was adorable lol

[Mike Lamb]

Haha! It just dawned on me that you actually got your own twisted version of the "rainbow" colored room by the end of the story. Even if it was unintentional (I'm guessing that you knew what you were doing from the "it looks pretty good" line), it's a nice subtle touch that throws an extra layer on the humor. You could probably even throw in a few more colors (purple and yellow would work with the gore theme). Just don't add a comment about actually getting the "rainbow colors" on the pink sheets like you always wanted...leave it as a "you either get it or you don't" joke.

[Mike Lamb]

Tell all fluffy cat icons advising you not to be so morbid to stay the hell away from dark comedy. IT'S DARK. THAT'S THE POINT.

Well, I liked it, anyway. Nice back and forth with the two selves. I'd recommend stretching out the ending some...the monster goes down pretty quick. Maybe throw some furniture around or something. Even though the older self could eventually take him out with the hammer (nice touch), I keep wanting to see the 8 year old trying to beat up the monster, but instead of hurting him she just sort of annoys him and trips him up while the older self hangs back waiting to get a clear shot.

I also like how she (older self and younger self) starts out ready to kick a*s, then has an "oh s**t" moment when the monster actually appears.

[Bella-Marie]

Interesting story. Not exactly funny, but certianly entertaining. I enjoyed the beginning, the ending was weird. Try not being so... morbid.
Good work otherwise.

[Hamkar]

Rather discusting blood image for the last scene. I like the story though. I can just imagine, "I saw me when I was grown up and that monster in my closet last night, I helped kill it" as an 8 yr old telling the class for news.