Still Good

Still Good

A Poem by tynamite
"

This is about me becoming more sad and others being jealous of the happiness that I have in the hardship that those people gave me.They hate it that I can make sunshine out of the rain they give them.

"
Things were fresh, when I came.
When I came, I came forth.
I came forth, but I had values.
But I had values, and sillyness, things had to change.

They were grouped, I was one.
I was one and, of what to become?
And what to become? Sediment.
Sediment from the coast, alone.

Alone, they never felt alot. 
Alot, I wanted just this once.
I wanted just this once, but it wasn't applicable.
Not applicable, was not for them.

They so have tried, to knock me down.
To knock me down, I have already been.
I have already been, through time after time.
Time after time, I'm dissed and excluded.

In whatever form, the hate.
The hate, just another way, to drill into a wall.
To drill into a wall, of backing of the past peoples.
Backing of the past peoples, supporting me.

Still supported by old and long friends.

Still good.

© 2010 tynamite



Author's Note

tynamite
I wrote this on the 5th of May 2006 which now is 4 years ago. And no, I was not feeling good at the time, I just looked happy.

The language is not the most understandable due to the structure that the poem has.
I just hope it's good and puts across what I was trying to say.

It's about me getting bullied in secondary school for 5 years. I had the worst secondary school experience ever and it was only untill Year 10 that my year stopped picking on me as they felt sorry for me, but the damage was too late by then and they already made their effects. There's not enough space to explain how bad it was or what happened.

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Reviews

Im sorry to hear you were treated so.Remember this it is the men with vision who will be in charge when the bullies are emptying the trash

Posted 6 Years Ago


I like this poem, was, and am bullied and have been since Kindergarten. It is true, and your poem tells it well.

Posted 6 Years Ago


That was the impression I got by reading this, of someone who stands alone and that intimidates others so they gang up on said person. Sometimes it seems people cannot stand seeing in others what they lack in themselves, like independance.
A unique format to this as well. Good job.

Posted 7 Years Ago


A powerful and emotional poem and one that many people can relate too. Love how you did this ^^

Posted 7 Years Ago


I really like the way the words double back on themselves, although more than a few times you come up to awkward word patterns here, excessive syllables ("it wasn't applicable," "of backing of the past peoples" and some others.) Still, as this is four years old, consider giving it another draft and seeing if you'd word it all the same. I do like the idea of being sediment on the coast.

Posted 7 Years Ago


This is a poem of bittersweet triumph. The narrator triumphs by not totally succumbing to the bullying cliques. But s/he is also soundly defeated by having to retreat into earlier, safer relationships in order to feel 'still good' and not forge ahead. Did you mean to say that?

Posted 7 Years Ago


I've never really been a victim of bullying, so I can't really relate. But I do like the repetitiveness in it. I used to write some poems like this; not the same topic, of course, but the style I remember.

Posted 7 Years Ago


i like the language. but i think the structure is way too repetative. How about
Things were fresh,
when I came forth,
but I had values.
and sillyness,
things had to change.

and just small changes like that i think would clean it up and make it more enjoyable. it was very good the way you explained yourself though and its very full of emotion, like all good poetry is. =]

Posted 7 Years Ago


I love the way you wrote this poem, very powerful.
Good job.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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389 Views
22 Reviews
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Added on April 27, 2010
Last Updated on June 9, 2010
Tags: hardship, good, values, happiness, sunshine, rain

Author

tynamite
tynamite

Birmingham, England, United Kingdom



About
I write about urban life, and I hate Young Adult books as I feel they're dumbing down literature and adult concepts for pre-teens. I would describe my writing as offbeat and finding the peculiars i.. more..

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