You Are My Moon

You told me your pains, and I gave you my heart
Ripped it out of my chest, as it beats a melodic tune
A key to unleash my feelings, a light in the dark
I bask in your light, I bathe in your moon

 

I yearn for your love, but love must be true
We come from different worlds, but we share kindred souls
Our love will never fall, if you believe that I do
That i'll bask in your light, because you are my moon

Author's Note

All reviews will be appreciated

Reviews

[Pash]

Wow. I really enjoyed your poem. I loved the transitions between lines. I was captivated by your word choices. I was there in the moments you created. Very well written. I can't wait to read more.
Keep writing.
Thank you for sharing.
DB.

[Ezekiel Silver]

An excellent poem that expresses beauty and love so effectively. A great piece.

[The Mad Prophet]

Always love poetry about the Goddess, or the Moon. In this case still, women are being represented by the moon. Very well done.

[L.G. Knight]

That is SOOOO SWEEETTTT it so totally brought out the romantic in me I just can't even tell you what a feet that is right now because though I may write about love I have completely given up on it and you almost made me believe in it again!
~Frances~

[Mariah]

We come from different worlds, but we share kindred souls

this is really sweet, something i can relate to.
i love this piece,
you seem like a sweetheart.
bless your soul.

[Steffi]

Really well done. Short yet long enough to bring in the reader in with your good word choice and imagery

[JC Fox]

a great piece, again I have to repeat myself you have a great talent.

[Joseph - Michael]

This is really great and I seriously can related to it almost too well...

Other than that, it's all good here...

[Sabbath_Nikole]

oh, i like this one, its short but it's simplicity is beautiful. Its soulful, touches my heart. Kudos.

[Todd]

This line blew me away: "I bask in your light, I bathe in your moon." That made the poem for me, and I like the near repetition of it at the last line. I wouldn't change anything in this except capitalizing your "I's" and putting an apostrophe in "I'll." This is a great and unconventional love poem. Keep writing, especially like this.