Concrete Angels Forum Memories....real or fake?

I barely recall my childhood. And what I do remember...well it don't make sense, because I DONT remember any of it happening. So I often wonder did I make this up, or could this horrible thing take place? I'm not sure at times...and it makes me unsure of myself.

I can understand where you are coming from although I am almost the opposite. I do remember the past and wonder if I am making it up and if maybe I really did not go through it. I think that is a defense mechanism that we all have that maybe we are not really from the places we think that we are from...

I'm more on the same side as EG but Cat too to a certain point. It's quite confusing.. not knowing what was fact and what was not. I often think like that about my abuse because I only rem so much of it and always wondered if the whoopings and how I was talked to growing up was actually abuse or just the way my family was. I feel guilty for thinking this way. ::sad::

You should never feel guilty for the way that you have been made to feel. Remember that you had no choices (you did not choose those things that make us who we are) they were forced on you. Your feelings are YOUR OWN!

Your right EG but its still hard.. because I always want to think and see the best of and in people.

Fortunately, I was not abused as a child. Don't get me wrong, I got my butt busted more than a few times and I remember gettin' the fire slapped out me for back talkin', but I'm none the worse for it. But I remember when my parents divorced I was 2 years old (people say you can't remember that far back, but I swear I can) and they would hide me from each other and come with the police to find me. I remember it as clear as day. I've asked them about it and they are amazed that I remember it, but I do.

I recall only one good memory at two...I walked for the first time to my grandfather, my mom's dad, whom I adored. The others at two...not pretty.

Crystal ( with the clover), The trauma you went through with your parents divorce and them hididng you is abuse in my book. They violated your rights to be seen and heard.

*Hugs* to you Cat.

About the hiding you and the police, that is terrible for a child to live in such uncertainty and terrifying for a child so young as well. I believe that you CAN remember that far, but normally those memories are not good ones to stick with you so long! It is great Cat that you have those good memories of yoru grandfather though. It is hard sometimes to focus on the good memories when there are so many bad, but they are always there for us when we need then, when we remember them!

I think it helps that I have a such a great relationship with both my Mom and my Dad now. They were young and dumb and I know all about young and dumb ::tongue:: . They made mistakes... they would never have intentionally hurt me. Now, I have seven younger brothers and sisters and I live in TN where my Mom is, but I got to Louisiana as often as possible to visit my Dad and stepmom. I think if I held grudges for what they did in the past I would only rob myself and my children of the happiness we have as a family now. They were different people then... not everyone changes, but I was fortunate!

Most children who have lived normal lives don't remember their childhood well. The children who have been traumatized are the ones that remember and have social issues and anxieties about relationships. Your mind can only cope with so much and then you, yourself have to cope. As children, coping meant dreaming away, telling oneself it wasn't true or just escaping by going somewhere else in your mind. As we age, those memories start popping up in places that are unexpected... Could be a picinic, a smell, a song anything... That is when the issues have to be dealt with because those triggers can literally ruin your life. It can cause nervous break downs. You'll notice yourself avoiding certain situations.

Don't tell that child within to stop talking. You must listen before you get better.


Krystal Waters